Author Archives: ttuttle12

Tim Tebow: God’s Media Whore in New York Babylon

It’s like a scene from the early breakout of a zombie plague

Ok, I admit that I stole that one from some dude over on the Denver Post blog who was rejoicing over the miraculous news that the Tebow parasite has just been peeled off of the Broncos organization. I suppose it’s only fitting that my return to blogging would be a short commentary of how overjoyed that I was to hear that Tim Tebow has left the Mile High City for the Big Apple. Broncos VP John Elway has to get NFL Executive of the Century consideration for pulling this one off. Imagine that it was only a few short months ago after the most overrated quarterback in NFL history, Jesus Tebow was the king of kings after that fluke playoff win against the hapless Pittsburgh Steelers. Tebow passed for 316 (as in John 3:16) yards in a stunning 29-23 home victory (actually more like a hundred and change if you take away Demaryius Thomas’s YAC) that had Elway looking nauseated and like he was doomed to wear a crown of thorns and stand knee deep in a tub of the shit of Tebow worshippers. Then Tebow reverted to form against the Patriots in a brutal 45-10 loss that could have been 90-10 had Bill Belichick not called off the dogs in the second half.

Now as a lifelong Denver Broncos fan and hard core hater of Evangelical Christian swine there was nothing more grating than watching Tebow become a media created legend last season, fraudulently gaining the rep of some kind of great comeback quarterbacking colossus while stinking the place up for three plus quarters. The thing with the Jesus freaks in America today is that they are every bit as delusional as the same zealots that they routinely denounce in other countries (insert radical Islamic bogeyman of the day) and in addition to the false legend of the great Tebow they sure as shit didn’t know a goddamned thing about football. I admit that for the first time in my life that I was actually cheering like hell for the Broncos to lose every week, I had some sheer moments of joy such as watching the apropos devouring of Tebow by the Lions, the Christmas Eve upchucking of multiple interceptions and fumbles returned for TD’s in Buffalo and of course the sadistic dismemberment in Foxboro in which Tom Brady threw for 6 TDs before Tebow had four completions. I also had some moments of rage such as the second quarter of that Steeler win where I had to shut off my 50 + inch HDTV rather than risk taking a baseball bat to it. The freaks were seeing Tebow’s face in tortillas after the one and Elway was going to have that cross to bear and the shame and ulcers to go along with it for years.

Then as the Christers like to say “it was God’s will” and lo and behold the Indianapolis Colts cut their ties with what was left of stat machine Peyton Manning. Now it’s a given that Manning who has suffered a serious neck injury and may never be the same, he’s also 36 but he hit the open market as the greatest free agent in league history. Elway, while he will never admit it saw his way out of the Tebow tribulations and put on a big time push to sign Manning, fiercely competing with the Tennessee Titans and the nearly 90 year old Bud Adams who was prepared to pay an unlimited sum of money for one last chance at seeing his transplanted Houston Oiler team make the Super Bowl. Denver won, Manning was signed to a huge contract and Tebow was a done deal in the Mile High City. The little bastard was traded within a matter of days to that great city of Satan New York, there is some very sweet schadenfreude in watching all of the peckerwoods pony up 70 or bucks for their kelly green number 15 jerseys for them and all of their rotten little indoctrinated fucking kids.

While I have never really liked Peyton Manning much, I have always thought of him as a crybaby and the white bread corporate pitchman of the NFL I am ecstatic to have him for the sole reason that he was the ONLY quarterback capable of putting the sword to the neck of Tebowmania in Denver. Shit, I could care less if his fucking head falls off the first time that he drops back in training camp – TEBOW IS GONE. Now if Manning does go down the Broncos are kind of fucked in that the backup (at least prior to the draft) is Caleb Hanie but really, Hanie would have beaten the new Christ had Marion Barber not run the fucking ball out of bounds late in the game on December 11th and then fumbled in overtime allowing kicker Matt Prater to kick two 50+ yard field goals and give Tebow the credit for the win. Anyway, the point that I am trying to make is that Mr. Hanie from Green Acres could probably have a better completion percentage than formerly orange Jesus without the circus.

As for Tim Tebow, he has gotten exactly what is fitting for a media whore like him, a prime gig in the media capital of the western world. This is going to be one hell of a show to watch, the Jets are already possessed of the most dysfunctional locker room in the NFL and the introduction of the cancer that is Tebow is going to eat them alive. Already the NY tabloids are hyping him like the second coming of Namath and the NFL and Jets organization are singing glory hallelujah as that high-priced (likely made in sweatshops) Tebow merchandise flies off the shelves. Quarterback Mark Sanchez, the embodiment of underachieving suckitude and already hated by local fans is now about to feel the wrath of the Tebow blood cult as well, those vermin ruined Kyle Orton who was left to slink out of town a broken man and Sanchez is next. The rumblings from the Jets locker room are already ugly and the season is going to be must watch entertainment for all. It’s especially funny to see the arrogant loudmouth Rex Ryan talking smack, he is like a man who has unwittingly ingested a slow acting poison and who will soon be dead while not knowing it yet. Again, it’s going to be a beautiful thing to behold this glorious appearing in the teeming metropolis of Gotham that has been denounced by the likes of radical cleric Pat Robertson as being so full of homosexual and liberal evil that the thousands of innocent Americans who died on September 11, 2001 in the American Reichstag Fire actually deserved to die.

You just can’t make shit like this up.

Anyway, enough of the sports for now, I’ll be back railing against the evils of religion and politics soon.


Of Hucksters and Hayseeds: GOP Trolls for Rubes in Iowa

The traveling cavalcade of clowns that is the Republican primary season kicks off with the Iowa caucuses this week. As if that haven of corn-fed schmucks is representative of the nation as a whole yet in our sham of a political system this somehow passes for a legitimate process. The entire gaggle of swine have been working the hustings and to add further insult the next step to the coronation of their prospective Führer the equally unrepresentative state of New Hampshire is next. This is serious corn pone along the lines of cheesy 1960’s sitcom Green Acres with all of the hayseeds like the Kimballs and the Haneys rolling into town in their Sunday finery to cast their lot with the one seriously deranged GOP jackass that truly represents them. I do find that Newton Leroy Gingrich has more than a passing resemblance to Arnold Ziffel. Iowans are just more refined versions of the red state fascist peckerwoods down yonder behind the cornbread curtain, hicks and rubes are hicks rubes no matter what neck of the woods that they may hail from. 

Now I am sure that Iowa is a nice place and there is much to see and do there (ha ha ha), thanks to deranged Republican candidate Michelle Bachmann it was pointed out that notorious serial murderer John Wayne Gacy began his illicit activities in Waterloo, a neighbor to Cedar Falls. Famous Iowans include Marion Morrison (the other John Wayne), Herbert Hoover (how apropos), Johnny Carson, Buffalo Bill and a true American hero in former FDR Vice President Henry A. Wallace who certainly knew a fascist when he saw one and must be rolling over in his grave over the GOP invasion. Other famous Iowans resonate greatly with the one true demographic that the Republicans routinely target, the geriatric Fox News viewers whose Cold War and anti-hippie, homophobic and predominantly white worldview easily accommodates such nonsensical horseshit as the Obama is a secret commie Muslim scam. Get a load of some of these names and see if you can find any sort of discernible pattern here:

William Frawley: Fred Mertz of I Love Lucy
Ann Landers: Professional gossip monger
Cloris Leachman: TV actress
Glenn Miller: Big band maestro
Harriet Nelson: THE Harriet from The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet
Donna Reed: Star of The Donna Reed Show
Andy Williams: Legendary crooner (once sang with Bing Crosby)

According to the 2010 Census Iowa is a whopping 91 percent white, 14.9 percent over 65 years of age and at with a population that is just a tad above 3 million represents less than one percent of the population of the nation as a whole. To sum it all up it is idiotic for the corporate media and the thoroughly corrupt political establishment to tout Iowa as some great representation of the entire United States. As Abe Lincoln once famously remarked:  

“You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.” 

It doesn’t take a mathematician to figure out that it’s one hell of a lot easier to fool a very small, predominately white and chock a block with famous 1950s-1960s television icons as the greatest former residents slice of the demographic pie like the cornshuckers in the Hawkeye State than the more sophisticated city slickers who have a better knack at spotting flim flam men. So the legend of Iowa as the great American weathervane ranks right up there with all of the other big lies of our times like the phony war on terror, the greatness of the American capitalist system and Tim Tebow as a legitimate starting NFL quarterback (he isn’t fit to carry the jockstrap of former Iowan Kurt Warner, himself a Jesus freak albeit a more humble one) and the increasingly creeping fascist police state apparatus as some sort of benevolent protector. Iowa brings to mind the great and underrated movie Pleasantville where the black and white 1950’s style of television show utopia is forever changed by two modern day teenagers who have been magically teleported into a sitcom by a TV repairman/ sorcerer played by Don Knotts and proceed to change the place for the better.

Pleasantville is a perfect metaphor for the conservative nonsense that is peddled by the traveling shit salespeople of the Republican party, their entire schtick falls apart if they can’t sell their silly non-reality based nostalgic gimmickry harkening back to a simpler and more moral time. The kids in the movie turn the black and white naivete and innocence into a stunning world of color and the hated nuance by introducing art, sex and non-conformity and rapidly run afoul of the town honchos who unleash the typical conservative reaction of violence, intimidation, hatred and rigged legal proceedings to stop the transformation. The “there are no roads out of Pleasantville” type of mentality that has allowed for the permeation of the poisonous disease carried by the Republicans that has for decades eaten our society from within. The world is a vastly more complicated, rapidly changing and thanks to new technologies interconnected environment and the changes represent a mortal threat to the white picket fence style of Americana that was mainlined into the consciousness of generations thanks to television, the most potent drug of them all. The Republicans are able to tap into this Pleasantville mind warp and to blame all of the real perceived evils of those chaotic decades of the 1960s and 1970s on those who would choose to live in a world of color and nuance rather than be mired like dinosaurs in a black and white tarpit, braying and keening as they are sucked under. The civil rights movement, equal rights for women, the Vietnam war, sexual liberation, Watergate, the hippies and drugs and rock and roll music really put a serious mindfucking on a lot of folks and they are desperate to cast their lot with whatever silver-tongued devil riding in on a white horse to rescue them from the savages best appeals to their longing for the past.

Republicans Troll For Rubes In The Hawkeye State
The entire fraudulent Republican bill of goods is designed to appeal to the suckers who can’t deal with social change. Their followers have rejected any form of progress of the past half century. They cling to their false idols like John Wayne and Ronald Reagan, both of whom are invoked constantly by the cynical and dishonest sheep herders trolling through the teenubg metropolises of Des Moines, Dubuque, Davenport and Waterloo as well as the outlying burgs like Battle Creek, Fort Dodge, Hawkeye and even Pleasantville (population 1,694 according to the 2010 census) as they sell peddle their lies. The lunatic Rick Santorum has found that his snake oil sells far better in Iowa and the man who once brought a dead fetus home to his wife is basking in the national media attention, he has visited all 99 counties and as of last week had conducted nearly 400 town halls and has taken to wearing a sweater vest as a costume. There was much made over the pilgrimages to the Evangelical Christian fast food franchise Pizza Ranch, a western themed restaurant that serves up greasy, cheesy pies along with bible based nonsense, the chains’ motto is PizzaRanchServes. In combining two of the most irrational aspects of modern conservative thinking being the revisionist version of history as filtered through John Wayne’s undershorts and the weaponized form of modern American Christianity (Billy Sunday also hailed from Iowa) Pizza Ranch is a slam dunk with the deniers and haters of the base. Moonbat Michelle Bachmann who gained attention for performing simulated fellatio on a foot long corndog at the Iowa State Fair last summer reportedly visited 14 pizza ranches in one week, Santorum’s kids it has been said are sick of pizza by now and even Ron Paul is holding sessions at the chain. It’s more than a bit ironic that Herman Cain, who made quite a name for himself in the pizza business before his proclivity to serve up the pepperoni to women other than his wife has dropped out and isn’t able to hit the cheese and sausage circuit. One of the more frequent pizza parlor visitors is of course Newton Leroy Gingrich, he didn’t after all get more chins than a Chinese phone book by hitting the salad bar. I don’t suppose that the pizza chain Cheesus Crust from the otherwise lamentable movie My Best Friend’s Girl will be opening any franchises in Iowa in the near future.
And so it begins, the New Years hangovers haven’t completely dissipated and the real onslaught is beginning in earnest. The sick joke of the national media swarms like flies to a fresh dungpile in Iowa, a thoroughly appropriate metaphor for the Republican candidates (Ron Paul and Jon Huntsman excepted) and the flies will soon migrate north to New Hampshire and other locales as the carnival of perversion, a moveable feast of bullshit that is the fascist Republican party primary season. This is going to be the greatest show on earth as well as a glittering showcase of all that has gone so terribly wrong and ugly in America today until the entire kit and kaboodle roars into Tampa come August for the largest gathering of Nazis, degenerates and stone cold freaks since the Nuremberg rallies of 1933.

No Christmas Miracles Bitch: Tebow Exposed

Jesus don’t want me for a sunbeam. ‘Cause sunbeams are not made like me.
Don’t expect me to cry for all the reasons you had to die. Don’t ever ask your
love of me.
Don’t expect me to cry.
Don’t expect me to lie.
Don’t expect me to die for thee.
– Nirvana (Jesus don’t want me for a sunbeam)

Much was made about media created phenom Tim Tebow’s pregame meeting with amputee High School quarterback Jacob Rainey who was flown to Buffalo for a nice bit of Christmas theatrics before Sunday’s Broncos vs. Bill Game. By the end of the afternoon, it was apparent to all but the blindest of the blind that Rainey could have given the now reeling Broncos a better shot than the most overrated quarterback in NFL history, at least the kid wouldn’t have thrown four picks. Just a bit of the sheen had worn off of the Mile High Messiah, Timothy Richard Tebow’s halo after a butt ugly beatdown by the Patriots but the chosen one’s Christmas Eve performance gave a new definition of the word fiasco. And to haters like myself all that I can say is – Hey, I fucking told you so. I admit that it’s been difficult to tolerate the two month running assault on common sense and football tradition that was the great Tebow PR machine, shredding up all those skeptics of the glorious ascension of the new American idol and at least according to some poor, wretched souls, the second coming of Christ himself. The amen chorus of the national punditry, the mouth-breathing “Christian” flockers and the sinister theocratic parallel universe had become so infatuated with the newborn king and his celebrity that apostates virtually had their tongues ripped out with fire-heated, cast iron tongs. The “all he does is win” meme was peddled like so much snake oil dipped religious folderol until it was finally shorn of its figleaf Saturday at Ralph Wilson Stadium when it was as if God himself chose to finally put to rest the absurdity that he really gives a rat’s ass about football. 

Tim Tebow, a quarterback who can’t throw has somehow been imbued with superhuman, dare I say divine powers for leading the theretofore woebegone Denver Broncos during a winning streak where the Mile High monsters eked out one close win after another largely to the credit of their balls nasty defense and kicker Matt Prater. Tebow of course got all the credit for the resurgence and in predictable manner is now being shorn of any of the blame for the last two losses. The Tebow winning streak was more than just a simple mirage, it was the type of mass insanity that conjures up memories of apocalyptic conjecture about smoking guns being mushroom clouds, Saddam Hussein’s weapons of mass destruction and the Iraq-bin Laden alliance to bring down the World Trade Center. The lazy swine in the sports media, absolutely pathetic with the exception of Dave Zirin, a giant among men with special note going to the ridiculous assholes in the Denver media market (Mark Kiszla, Woody Paige etcl) who joined the Tebowing terrorists in running the lamentable Kyle Orton out of town and pressuring the now doomed John Elway into installing, on the basis of hype and unrelenting pressure rather than any sort of merit their glorious loveboy at quarterback pushed this insanity. They are the Judith Millers of the national madness of Tebowmania. ESPN transformed itself into the Tebow network, and the naysayers about the greatness of Jesus Tebow were mocked, shunned and bent to conformity, much in the way that Bushreich critics were dealt with in the run up to the attack and occupation of Iraq. 

Any serious look at the Tebow winning streak by an objective football fan would see that the young man had very little to do with winning those games, he played better than could be expected in many but that sets the bar extremely low. After exorcising Orton the Broncos came back after 55 listless minutes to beat the Miami Dolphins juggernaut that was winless at the time in overtime 18-15, the South Florida stadium was filled to the brim with Tebow worshippers on Tim Tebow Day and the “legend” was launched. A bump in the road the next week when Tebow was mauled by the Detroit Lions in an embarrassing 45-10 home thumping still has the Christers squealing about religious persecution over their mocking of Tebow. Next up was a comeback win against the hated Oakland Raiders in the Black Hole. The 38-24 victory had more to do with a still rusty Carson Palmer throwing three picks, speedy Denver kick return specialist Eddie Royal taking one to the house and resurrected running back Willis McGahee making mincemeat out of the Raider defense in the second half for two long TD runs and 163 yards. The Raider win was out of an option package that belongs in high school and college so Tebow got all of the credit for executing the win, coach John Fox had listened to the Tebow cultists and changed the offense to fit their boy’s skill set. Next up was a 17-10 win against the dismal Kansas City Chiefs in which Tebow completed only two fucking passes! 

The streak continued in prime time on the NFL Network with a 17-13 comeback against the mouthy fat Rex Ryan and his now eliminated from the playoffs New York Jets, Tebow gets some credit here as his late touchdown run sealed the win. Win # 5 came at San Diego with the Chargers in freefall riding a five game losing streak and in overtime when their kicker was caught by the television cameras pissing in a bottle o the sidelines and then blowing the game winning kick, allowing Prater to win it with his own FG. Win #6 was an aberration being that it came against the woeful Minnesota Vikings who are still in some sort of post Brett Favre fugue state and have one of the worst defenses in the league. Said Vikings were also without superstar running back Adrian Peterson and were starting a rookie quarterback in Christian Ponder who threw three interceptions, the last one a gift to Denver’s Andre Goodman that set up another winning Prater field goal. Tebow threw for 202 yards in this one, 144 of them to a receiver, Demaryius Thomas who was labeled as such a bust that apparently nobody bothered to even cover him. With the Tebowmania in full throated frenzy and the fleet of bandwagons growing by the minute the myth took a hit with win #7, a 13-10 overtime win at home that was one of the greatest choke jobs ever by the gutsy and injury riddled Bears. With the Chicago defense having kept Tebow down and the Broncos scoreless for nearly 58 minutes collapsed. With Tebow having tossed a late score to Thomas to cut the lead to 10-7 the Broncos failed to recover an onside kick with 2:08 to go. Enter the latest goat in Chicago sports history, replacement running back Marion Barber who inexplicably ran out of bounds to stop the clock and save the Broncos around 40 seconds which allowed Prater to kick a 59 yarder to take the game to overtime. In the extra stanza, Barber broke through the line to redeem himself and while heading towards the winning touchdown that would ring down the curtain on the fabled Tebow’s winning streak fumbled the ball! Minutes later Prater kicked the winner. Barber, who is a stone Jesus freak himself had the second worst week for a former Dallas Cowboy turned Chicago Bear but only because Sam Hurd was busted by the Feds for his role in setting up a drug distribution network. The Tebow fans would swear that Barber was blown out of bounds by the breath of God himself and that Jesus was right there causing the Barber overtime fumble. 

The next week wasn’t so good for the Mile High Messiah. A nearly unprecedented second Sports Illustrated cover appearance in less than a month and a classic skit on the haven of liberal demonology that is Saturday Night Live during which Jesus himself told Tebow to take it down a notch, the national media frenzy over a matchup against Tom Brady, Bill Belichick and the New England Patriots were a one-two-three combination that not even Orange Jesus would be able to overcome. The SNL skit was hilarious and went viral, bringing the condemnation of the Christers bleating about mockery of their religion and bigotry, the second being a thing that they are intimately familiar with when it comes to gays, Muslims and liberals. Radical cleric Pat Robertson taking a rest from anti-gay demagoguery and blaming natural disasters on the wrath of God towards a society that tolerates homosexuals came out and howled in mock outrage as well. The Christers sure can’t take it when they themselves are scorned and dragging their Manchurian Candidate Tebow through shit is akin to raw blasphemy right up there with the infamous Piss Christ. The latest target of these neo-Nazi swine is HBO comic Bill Maher who had the audacity to gloat on TWITter about Tebow’s rancid Christmas Eve performance in Buffalo: “Wow, Jesus just fucked #TimTebow bad! And on Xmas Eve! Somewhere in hell Satan is tebowing, saying to Hitler “Hey, Buffalo’s killing them.”.  There are now calls for boycotts against HBO for Maher’s comments – why don’t these anal retentive, fired to the max with hatred and insipid pigfuckers just get a life already? Not that Maher is a favorite of mine personally, he is a virulent anti-Muslim bigot in his own right who at least in that regard has much in common with the Tebowers, teabaggers and the rest of the filth that inhabits the right wing in this country. He is also a sleazy apologist for Israeli atrocities but come on, while most of us know that it’s utter bullshit isn’t this country supposed to stand for the ability to engage in free speech? The Tebowers are a bunch of charlatans anyway, how many of them actually went to church on Christmas morning this year and how many stayed at home to engage in the act of worship of mammon over the teachings of Christ and fornicated like horny rats on their living room floors in an orgy of festive gift wrapping and made in China consumer goods? Jesus Christ, just fuck these people already. Go away and emigrate to Iran or Israel if you all enjoy living in a totalitarian theocratic state.

But I digress…

The Denver Broncos are now 8-7 and after two consecutive turds laid by Tebow are facing a must win game against the Kansas City Chiefs on Sunday to get into the playoffs. The same Kansas City Chiefs who claimed Kyle Orton off of waivers last month and now the one who was so brutally scourged and run out of Denver on a rail gets the chance to come back and pound in the nails.

Shit, the irony is delicious isn’t it?

Just my two cents over the morning cup o’ Joe

Red State:The Enemy Within

“You’re already dead sinner. You destroyed your spirit in a waste of shame.”
-Pastor Abin Cooper
“People just do the strangest things when they believe they’re entitled, but they do even stranger things when they just plain believe.”

-Agent Joseph Keenan

Earlier this week I had the opportunity to watch Kevin Smith’s new movie Red State and have to say that is an audacious exercise in film-making unlike anything that I have ever seen before. Smith, more famous for his comedic talents seen in movies like the cult classic Clerks and the religious satire Dogma boldly goes straight for the jugular in this scathing work of truly important social commentary. With America having been flipped fascist, largely through the work of Christian zealots whose gospel bears scant resemblance of the teachings of Jesus Christ far too little serious attention is given to the dangerous and hateful enemy within. The type of venomous, intolerant, anti-intellectual and when it comes down to it just plain anti-American Evangelical Christianity that wants to remake society into a theocratic militarized dictatorship to enforce their brutal vision of utopia on all who are different from them is horrifying and dangerous. This sort of mutated Christianity has metastasized throughout America like a ravenous cancer or in a red state context, an alien strain of kudzu and has played no small part in the destruction of our once functional but now failed political system. Red State does the unthinkable in post 9/11 America by calling a spade a spade regarding the menace of Christian extremism.

The movie is set in an unidentified part of heartland America, likely a state that is solidly Republican where the mundane suburban communities contain the truly monstrous, the good Germans and little Eichmanns of this rotting and adrift empire. Innocuous homes with finely kept lawns similar to where religious fanatic Michele Bachmann’s hero John Wayne Gacy once lived and brutally murdered gay young men all while appearing to be outwardly normal. The movie particularly focuses on the savage homophobia, scapegoating and desire to eradicate gay people from the world looked down upon by a wrathful and merciless God. The plot begins when three horny teenagers named Travis, Jared and Billy Ray surfing the sex sites on the internet via their smart phone set up an arrangement to meet an older woman who has promised to take on all three of them. The boys borrow one of their parents’ car and head off to fictional Cooper’s Dell in search of that nasty sort of sexual debauchery that only a youngster with little maturity and a dick as hard as Chinese arithmetic can truly understand. Making jokes along the way to the encounter about how it’s going to be like fucking their mothers the boys sideswipe a vehicle where the local sheriff, Sheriff Wynan is engaged in sex with another man and flee the scene of the accident.

Travis, Jared and Billy Ray then roll up in front of a trailer where the woman who had solicited the encounter, Sarah Cooper who is played by Melissa Leo (who just won the Oscar as Best Supporting Actress for her tour de force role as the conniving mother in The Fighter) greets them. The boys are offered beer by Sarah who insists that they drink before having sex. As the three get undressed they discover that the beer has been drugged and all pass out. When they awaken they are in a chapel with a handful of worshippers although not sitting in pews, Jared is in a cloth covered cage being carried into the room while the other two are bound in a crawlspace below the pulpit. To his horror they realize that they are captives of the virulently anti-gay, militant pastor Abin Cooper who played by Michael Parks, former star of the 1960s television series Then Came Bronson. Parks performance, loosely based on the notorious Reverend Fred Phelps of the Westboro Baptist Church is mesmerizing and while due to the subject matter which would scramble hordes of thuggish Christian activists like squadrons of S.A. brownshirts he will sadly not receive the recognition that he is deserving of for this role. Parks is not the hellfire and brimstone type, preaching politics from their taxpayer subsidized den of iniquity churches, he is actually soft-spoken but the demeanor masks a dark fanaticism that is the one most dangerous trait of the true believers, an incandescent inner psychotic fervor.  This is an Oscar winning caliber type of performance by Mr. Parks, a career keystone yet Red State will likely be ignored by the cowardly media and corrupt and morally debased Hollywood kingmakers.

We soon find out that Sarah, the woman who lured the boys into a trap is the pastor’s daughter sitting among the other in the pews. Cooper begins a long sermon on the evils of society and blaming homosexuals who he calls “Satan’s instrument on Earth” in the manner that Evangelical Christian pastors across the land do on a daily basis. The children in the audience are then led from the room by Sarah’s daughter Cheyenne (Kerry Bishé) and the sermon continues. Now it is seen that a man has been bound to a cross on the altar with plastic wrap, a bondage gag-ball like the ones in the basement scene in Pulp Fiction in his mouth to muffle his cries. This is a gay victim previously entrapped in an internet chat room scam who was lured into the clutches of the church similar to the three boys. After more anti-gay demagogy in his soft voice, Cooper gives the order, a gun is produced from inside a bible and the man is executed. His body is dropped into the crawlspace where Travis and Billy Ray have been imprisoned. Jared soon discovers that he is to be the next one on the cross to be denounced and murdered. 
Meanwhile, Sheriff Wynan has dispatched a deputy to find the car that hit him and sits in his office distraught and fondling his pistol while looking at a picture of his wife on his desk. The deputy finds the boys’ parents car with the damage at the Cooper compound. Inside the church Jared and Billy Ray have now managed to cut through their plastic wrap using a protruding broken bone of the dead gay man and are desperately trying to escape with several church members in hot pursuit. Billy Ray pursued by Sarah’s husband Caleb through the narrow basement corridors enters a room and finds it is an arsenal, stocked with various forms of weaponry. The grabs an automatic rifle as Caleb pulls his own gun and they both shoot each other. Abin Cooper has gone to the front gate to meet with deputy Pete who hears the shots and is then himself shot dead by church member Mordecai. Cooper gets on the slain officer’s radio and taunts and threatens Sheriff Wynan with exposing his homosexuality to his wife using pictures that the church has taken. The sheriff then appears ready to put his gun to his head but right before doing so spots a notice from the ATF on the office wall and  puts in a call to bring in the Feds. In a new scene the phone rings at the home of special agent Joseph Keenan, played by John Goodman rousting him from bed that ends up with an order to go to visit the compound. The church had been under investigation for the acquisition of weapons.
Back inside the chapel, Jared is now on the cross while Sarah wails at him over the death of her husband, his body now in front of the congregation as Abin Cooper sermonizes and plays the piano in a service for Caleb. Travis, who played dead when the men of the congregation went to investigate the shooting has grabbed and automatic weapon and makes a break to escape with the male church members in hot pursuit. When Jared emerges from the building into the courtyard he is shot down. The ATF force led by Keenan is now outside of the gates of the compound. The shooter was closeted gay Sheriff Wynan who is pounded upon and dressed down by Keenan for his trigger happy escalation of the situation. Keenan is outraged, having already made reference to the agency’s past history when on the phone with his superior he fully understands the potential for violence. Inside the compound the members arm themselves and prepare to go out in a blaze of glory. Keenan announces through a bullhorn the intent to execute a search warrant on the property and after a brief moment of quiet Cooper appears in an upper window with a hunting rifle and kills an ATF officer with a shot to the head, taunting the heavily armed government men by shouting “come on” after which all hell breaks loose.

Keenan calls to request backup and to inform his superior officers that the situation has escalated into a shoot out. He is asked about media and gives the response that due to the remoteness of the compound that media is not a factor. Keenan is then given the order to storm the complex and kill all within to which he pleads that there are kids inside before asking for something in writing to protect himself and his field office before he agrees to execute the order. In the next scene, Keenan is in a stable when he informs one of his agents that the situation has been “reclassified” and that they are going to “take down this domestic terrorist cell.” As the agent pleads with him for a measured response Keenan reads an email from his cellphone. The email is an official statement:

Our investigation of the Five Points Church in Cooper’s Dell has uncovered an extremely hostile domestic terrorist cell, heavily armed with intentions of bombing a local shopping mall this morning. When we came with arrest warrants they opened fire on us, killing the assistant special agent in charge, giving us no choice but to take the premises with deadly force. In the resulting firefight all suspects were killed. 

The young agent named Harry is distraught and argues with Keenan that there are children inside and that they are going to be the “bad guys” in this situation but is rebuffed coldly. Keenan says “I got eighteen years in, I’m not telling my wife she’s got to clip coupons till we’re dead because I can’t follow a simple order, shitty as that order is…and we’re not talking about Gandhi here”. Harry struggles with the order and then passes it on. As Cheyenne has gone outside to plead with the agents for mercy due to the children an agent produces a throwaway weapon, fires shots and gives it to her, his intent is obviously to gun her down in cold blood as soon as she takes it but while he is distracted and struggling with the girl Sarah walks up behind him and shoots him in the back of the head. Back inside, Cheyenne frees Jared who is bound to the cross and implores him to go with her to the agents to tell the real story, that the terrorist threat was bogus and that they could both stop the slaughter. Sarah finds the two in a room and a struggle ensues where by accident Cheyenne shoots her own mother. Her and Jared then run from the building to confront Keenan imploring him to keep the ATF men from killing the children but she is then shot in the head at point blank range by agent Harry who also guns down Jared. He is just following orders.

Then a bizarre and deafening sound like a roar of a mighty trumpet is heard, the agents are confused but the sound is heard by Pastor Cooper and the remaining live members of the church who have not been killed in the shootout begin to celebrate. They have interpreted the sound as God’s message that the judgement day has come and emerge from the compound unarmed. Cooper sermonizes to the stunned agents about the four angels being loosed and that the Rapture has come. He rants at the “G” men, “G” for godless, “G” for government and advances, taunting Keenan to shoot him. The camera then pans out and the next scene has Keenan in front of his superiors in an inquiry explaining what happened next,  that he subdued the suspect with a head butt and rounded up the remaining church members. The horn of God was revealed to be just a random act by a bunch of hippie pot farmers on a neighboring property who had hooked an ipod up to a fire engine siren in order to fuck with Cooper’s flock who were being harassed by Cooper’s goons by getting their hopes up for the Rapture. He was chastised for disobeying a direct order and then told he’s been promoted. When asking about Cooper’s fate he is fed the whopper that “the U.S. government doesn’t kill people in or out of custody” and that under the Patriot Act that Cooper would be disappeared without trial. The recording device is then turned off and Keenan’s superiors state, quite correctly that “if you kill an American because of a religious belief, you are a terrorist” and that people like Cooper should be locked up under the post 9/11 rules that have eviscerated the Constitution. Keenan then asks why he was given the order to kill the Cooper clan and his boss replies with a smirk “fuck people like this, they’re animals” and that Jesus saves but he isn’t going to save Pastor Cooper from a fuckload of prison rape. The final scene has Cooper in a prison cell sermonizing and singing and one of the fellow prisoners shouts “shut the fuck up”.

Red State is brilliant in it’s commentary, not only for bringing attention the the seriously dangerous form of violent Christianity that has become so prevalent since the 1980’s and the militia types that are drawn to it but also in that it criticizes the heavy handed actions of the government. The “terrorist” attacks of 9/11 and the transformation of the United States into a fascist police state where posse comitatus and habeas corpus have been junked have enabled local police and governments to become militarized. The use of this power, not constrained by any sort of traditional law will become more commonplace as the ongoing economic collapse worsens and as the people take to the streets in protest. The police are already using violence to put down Occupy movement demonstrations that are a real grass roots uprising unlike the phony right-wing Tea Party and if they continue to grow they will represent a threat to the status quo that absolutely will not be tolerated. Serious civil unrest is coming to America very soon, one need only to look at the rest of the world and the growing backlash against vampire capitalism. The ruling class is not going to wait much longer before loosing the government on the protests which will only worsen the situation as the society begins to unravel. The wild card are the Christian fanatics, who truly harbor terrorist intent and are like Pastor Cooper’s clan, armed to the teeth and ready to rumble. They will be used by the establishment as shock troops when the time comes and they will be backed by government thugs as they defend the existing order. Judgment day is getting closer although not in any biblical sense and be assured that there will be blood.

I would strongly recommend Red State to all readers, this is not a movie that is going to be promoted by anything other than word of mouth, heretical that it is to the powerful and those that they depend upon to maintain their blessed order. 

Just my two cents


False Idol Tebow Devoured By Lions

“There may be flies on you and me, but there are no flies on Jesus”
– Hunter S. Thompson

It was so apropos, the Christian being fed to the Lions. Just one week after his media sensationalized glorious appearing when he smited the Miami Dolphins, Tim Tebow was exposed as the fraud that he has always been.  In one of the worst quarterbacking performances in Denver Broncos history the cult of personality that is Tebowmania was shown the true fruits of their blessed savior culminating in a brutal 45-10 beatdown on Orange Sunday. Actually the score is misleading as to how lopsided the ‘game’ was, the resurgent, smack-talking Detroit Lions put it into cruise control mode after running up a 45-3 fourth quarter lead and were putting in their scrubs, it was only that Tebow accumulated the bulk of his stats.  With Tebow fully in charge of the offense the Broncos came out roaring themselves, going right down the field behind two runs that gained 49yards and a great touchdown catch by WR Eric Decker, the only acquisition of the lamentable Josh McDaniels era who seems to have promise as a player . Only the touchdown wasn’t, Decker was jobbed by the refs for being out of bounds and the Broncos settled for a Matt Prater field goal and a 3-0 lead. Then it was Tebow Time!

For the next three quarters Timothy Richard Tebow was more putrid than even a hater like I believed, taking seven sacks, overthrowing receivers and having a fumble and interception returned for scores. The orange clad throng at recently renamed Sports Authority Stadium was quieted as the former Florida Gator was exposed as the untalented wretch that he has been since he joined the NFL. It was the biggest crackup in a Denver stadium since my old teenage friend “Buzz” who was hopelessly shitfaced on Mad Dog 20-20 took a tumble down forty rows of steps and laid vomiting and bleeding in front of a horrified troop of cub scouts and their den mother at old Mile High. So much for all of that happy horsecrap about the vaunted Jon Gruden working with Tebus to change his throwing motion, the guy is the prototypical Florida Gators quarterback which translates into not NFL material. This is going to get even more interesting, having been forced to bow to the demands of the mob of Tebow terrorists to bench the doomstruck failure Kyle Orton it is incumbent upon coach John Fox and grand football poobah John Elway to keep trotting Timmy out there for all to see. Next up, a stop in the raucous den of sin that is the Black Hole in Oakland where the fascist police just shot an Iraq war vet in the head with a gas canister or something during a local #OccupyWallStreet protest… is this a great country or what?  It will likely be another long afternoon for Tebow, especially with the Raiders coming off of a bye after an embarrassing 28-0 home loss to Kansas City looking for blood.

It was always going to be like this for Tebow, the idea that he is a capable NFL starter has been farcical from the get go. Had former Broncos coach McDaniels not been such and easily bamboozled chump who traded up and down in Belichikian fashion in order  to land Tebow in the first round of the draft the boy wonder would have probably still been on the board in the fifth round. It was absolutely imperative for the evangelical Christian fifth column to ensure that he was a first round pick and have a national pulpit for their message of intolerance, hatred and magical thinking for the next decade before launching his political career. A few more weeks of playing like he did on Sunday and the fucker won’t be able to be elected as dogcatcher and the Christers could for once do like Jesus and give those orange #15 jerseys to the poor. Were Tebow a typical former college quarterback without a public relations and media colossus behind him he would probably be starting in the NFL as an h-back or converted tight end, hell he would be far and away the best running back on the Broncos roster right now were he to be a team player and surrender the quarterback wet dream. Too bad that there has been so much invested in the kid by a national movement that is  hellbent on overthrowing the country within and implementing a theocratic form of government more in line with the diseased ravings of Rousas John Rushdoony than the thoughtful ideas of Thomas Jefferson.

Back to the game, it was as heinous a debacle as last year’s 59-14 bludgeoning by the Raiders that punched McDaniels ticket out of town if not even worse, there was actually some sort of bizarre false hope here, kind of like before the Nazis rolled into the Warsaw Ghetto and showed that it was hopeless from the onset. Here in America though the morons like their false reality served sunny side up with a heaping dish of sugar coated bullshit on the side. The cult of personality and the feckless and complicit media were swooning over Timothy Richard Tebow after his “miracle” comeback against the pathetic Dolphins last week. Tebow was the toast of the nation, the next great quarterback and a messianic figure just four short days ago. The networks built their entire weekly narrative on the great Tebow and the NFL itself, no stranger to shameless marketing promotions, notable the pink shoes to pander to the female demographic during breast cancer awareness month and the flag-sucking tributes to the American Reichstag Fire 9/11, even hyped the Broncos v. Lions game as a biblical battle of good (Tebow) vs. evil (fearsome Detroit defensive lineman Ndamukong Suh). Everyone was in for this one, all in… especially Tebow himself who showed all in attendance and a large television audience what any serious football fan already knew, that he has no future whatsoever as a real live pro football quarterback.

Between the errant throws and three and outs Tebow was hit and sacked by the new bad boys of Motown in their silver and Honolulu blue without remorse. Some of the Lions even dared to engage in the new fad of “Tebowing” after their sacks of Orange Jesus. Of course the Christers, the perpetual victims that they are and keep their flocks of fucking ignoramuses fired up by playing immediately screamed sacrilege that the Lions were mocking Christianity itself. Not that the evangelical zealots need any help with that one, they have dragged the teachings of Jesus Christ through an overflowing with shit sewer of anger, bigotry, war worship and anti-gay demagoguery as they have revised their religion to the point where Christ is the one ousted from the temple by the moneychangers. They wailed and gnashed their teeth over the Lions on field antics but have zero problem when gays are beaten in hate crimes egged on by their blasphemous perversions of Christ’s message. Hell, were Jesus to return to the USA Today preaching the same message he would either be crucified anew or be just another Middle Eastern man locked in a small cage at Gitmo or at another of our secret torture sites.  Tebowing became a national craze after numero 15 kneeled in prayer after Miami’s implosion led to an improbable overtime win, a thoroughly tasteless religious display at a goddammed football game. I mean come on, do you think that a Muslim quarterback would be afforded the deference paid to Tebow were he to pray on the sideline? This is the new America/Homeland and there would be catcalls and wails for a halftime beheading at the fifty yard line were that to ever occur. Homeland Security would probably be parachuted into the stadium to haul him off and be disappeared into our gulag system.

After what I personally rank as one of the best plays in Broncos history, a 100 yard pick six by Detroit’s Chris Houston, great because it may spare the team from a lost decade under Tebow,  the Lions defender commented:

“We just wanted to make him be a quarterback,” said Houston, who revealed the defensive game plan was based on the Lions’ steadfast belief that Tebow was incapable of moving the Broncos to a score by completing six consecutive passes in any drive. “We had somebody take away his legs and made him use his arm.”

And so they did. And so the latest big lie of the corporate media was shorn like a sheep. The broadcast of the game was vomit inducing. Former star safety John Lynch spent the broadcast making excuses and seemed to have been sniffing one of Tebow’s used jockstraps in the booth. Lynch repeatedly blamed Broncos coaches for not changing the offense to fit Tebow, fuck the rest of the team right? One article referenced that Tebow’s name was mentioned an incredible 140 times during the broadcast. It didn’t take long for the right-wing swine in the media to pick up the meme that coach John Fox intentionally sabotaged Tebow, of course this giant turd emerged from Rupert Murdoch’s terrorist broadcasting organization – surprise, surprise. What’s next, Bill O’Reilly denouncing John Fox as a secret Muslim agent determined to implement Sharia Law? The wound is still fresh but already there are rumblings that the myth of Tebow as miracle working man of God is under siege and mercifully may be taken down. From – Opponent: Tebow experiment is‘embarrassing’:

“Can you believe ’15’?” one Detroit Lions defender asked after his team’s 45-10 immolation of Tebow and the Denver Broncos. “Come on – that’s embarrassing. I mean, it’s a joke. We knew all week that if we brought any kind of defensive pressure, he couldn’t do anything. In the second half it got boring out there. We were like, ‘Come on – that’s your quarterback? Seriously?’ ”

It would be one thing if this particular defender could be written off as an outlier, but during the time I spent in the Lions’ locker room after the game – and, later, on the phone with various coaches, front-office executives and players around the league – similarly harsh assessments were uttered about the second-year quarterback making his second start of the 2011 season.

Words like atrocious, terrible, completely exposed and not even close to ready kept coming up in these conversations; a couple of Lions even used the term oh my god. They did not appear to be mocking Tebow’s devout Christian beliefs – however, at least two Detroit players (middle linebacker Stephen Tulloch and tight end Tony Scheffler) made a point of “Tebowing” during the game, imitating the prayerful pose the quarterback struck following the previous Sunday’s stunning overtime victory over the Miami Dolphins.

The point that was driven home on Sunday, and quite forcefully, was this: Against a crappy team like the winless Dolphins, the possibility exists that Tebow can get away with 55 minutes of flaccid football and, with the help of a blessed onside-kick recovery, add to the legend forged at Florida, where he had one of the most decorated college football careers of all time. However, against an emerging power like the Lions (6-2), he’s as overmatched and vulnerable as an adolescent’s eardrums in the front row of a Nickelback concert.

“As long as he felt our pressure,” said Lions defensive end Cliff Avril, whose third-quarter sack/fumble/recovery/return produced one of Detroit’s two defensive scores, “he was gonna make crazy decisions.”

In fairness, Tebow’s 18-for-39, 172-yard performance – numbers padded considerably by garbage-time completions, if you can believe that – wasn’t solely the product of dubious choices. His limited skill set was also on display, from an acute lack of accuracy, to a deliberate delivery (Avril dislodged the ball while Tebow was extending his arm backward before attempting to pass), to an apparent uncertainty about where to go with the ball.
– – –
None of this was necessarily a surprise to the Broncos’ brass, including coach John Fox and executive vice president of football operations John Elway. Tebow’s flaws were obvious to all trained observers during training camp, which is why veteran Kyle Orton was named the team’s unquestioned starter in August.
Orton’s struggles – and Denver (2-5) losing four of its first five games – caused the Broncos’ decision-makers to call an audible, a move greeted by great popular acclaim. Yet it’s hard to imagine that Elway, one of the greatest quarterbacks in football history, saw anything he didn’t expect on Sunday. It was as if, by starting Tebow, he said to the 74,977 fans at Mile High, “You wanted this guy? OK, then … Heeeerrrree’s Timmy!”

In other words – you wanted it? Now eat it you motherfuckers!!! Eat it until the scales are ripped away from your eyes and you are burning your number fifteen jerseys in the parking lot like Bears fans did when former Bronco quarterback Jay Cutler pulled up lame in last year’s NFC Championship and let his team down. A sad fact of life is that reality sucks, not that any of you Tebow suckling Christers have any idea of what reality actually is in your jacked up on Jesus parallel universe.


With a lot of blacks, there’s quite a bit of resentment along with their dissent, and possibly rightfully so. But we can’t all of a sudden get down on our knees and turn everything over to the leadership of the blacks. I believe in white supremacy until blacks are educated to a point of responsibility. I don’t believe in giving authority and positions of leadership and judgment to irresponsible people.
– Marion Morrison (aka John Wayne)
The one thing that I truly admire about Pat Buchanan is that he is unapologetic. He wears his racism, fealty to the Republican party and religious fervor on his sleeve. While the rest of the ratfuckers in the GOP Tea Party keep using the ridiculous novelty candidacy of Herman Cain as somehow being proof that they are not racist Buchanan has the balls to just tell it like it is. In the most recent issue of The American Conservative, the magazine which Buchanan was a founder the cover feature is a long essay by Ron Unz entitled Republicans and the End of White America. The essay while citing sources and stats in no uncertain terms advocates for the transformation of the GOP into the “white party” and slyly calls for the party platform to exist exclusively on race-baiting issues in order to capitalize on the coming demographic wave that will have the white folk as the minority in the United States by as soon as mid-century. I find it a bit ironic that the loss of the white stranglehold on this country would cause so much consternation considering that the original inhabitants were definitely not Caucasian but such truths are lost on Buchanan, Unz and the racist to the core Republican party.
Unz, another of the touted former entrepreneur GOP right-wing turds that have the great American cesspool overflowing and who is the publisher of American Conservative has a history of anti-Hispanic activism, specifically bilingualism and illegal immigrant rabble rousing. Meskin’ bashing is the new coin of the realm of the Republicans, especially the useful idiot Astroturf Dick Armey of darkness that are the teabaggers. Alabama, which one could hardly imagine being under siege by illegals recently passed a draconian style anti-immigration law that made Arizona’s ‘papers please’ state harassment of brown skinned people look like the fucking Rainbow Coalition. Let’s be honest here, the fascist Republican party is only able to exist by appealing to the lowest common denominator of racism and religious nonsense (many times simultaneously) that provide cover for their big corporate and plutocratic funders. Paymasters like the infamous Koch Brothers the mega-tax chiselers who have retrofitted 1950’s John Birch Society style nonsense about the communist conspiracy, fluoride in the water and destruction of capitalism to fit nicely with the teabaggers and their foolishness. Ironic that the Koch family fortune that keeps the machine rolling along was made by their daddy Fred building oil refineries for the vicious communist dictator Joseph Stalin but that is the way it goes with the GOP, all hypocrisy all the time. 
The American Conservative piece is dense and well-written which wraps this racist dreck in somewhat scholarly terms but a turd is still a turd even if it’s prettied up. Unz’s cover piece is really just about promoting Buchanan’s latest book Suicide Of A Superpower. Old Pat recently wrote a screed entitled A.D. 2041: End of White America? In which the author issues a Code Red to bigots, conjuring up a plethora of GOP talking points in it that will surely be the red meat shoveled into the feeding trough come next year’s campaign season. I excerpt the following pieces:

John Hope Franklin, the famed black historian at Duke University, once told the incoming freshmen, “The new America in the 21st century will be primarily non-white, a place George Washington would not recognize.”

In his June 1998 commencement address at Portland State, President Clinton affirmed it: “In a little more than 50 years, there will be no majority race in the United States.” The graduates cheered.

The Census Bureau has now fixed at 2041 the year when whites become a minority in a country where the Founding Fathers had restricted citizenship to “free white persons” of “good moral character.”

With publication today of “Suicide of a Superpower: Will America Survive to 2025?” this writer takes up what this portends. And while many on the left are enthusiastic about relegating the America of Eisenhower and JFK to a reactionary past, I concur with the late Clare Boothe Luce.

In this world, she said, there are optimists and pessimists.

“The pessimists are better informed.”

What are the seemingly inevitable consequences of an America where whites are a shrinking minority?

First, the end of a national Republican Party that routinely gets 90 percent of its presidential votes from white America.

When Texas, where two-thirds of the newborns and half the schoolchildren are Hispanic, goes the way of California, it is the end for the GOP. Arizona, Colorado and Nevada, also critical to any victorious GOP coalition, are Hispanicizing as rapidly as Texas.

In every presidential election since Bush I in 1992, Hispanics have given 60-70 percent of their votes to the Democratic ticket.

For Hispanics, largely poor and working class, are beneficiaries of a cornucopia of government goods — from free education to food stamps to free health care. Few pay federal income taxes.

Why would they not vote for the Party of Government?

What is happening to America is happening across the West.

Can Western civilization survive the passing of the European peoples whose ancestors created it and their replacement by Third World immigrants? Probably not, for the new arrivals seem uninterested in preserving the old culture they have found.

Those who hold the white race responsible for the mortal sins of mankind — slavery, racism, imperialism, genocide — may welcome its departure from history. Those who believe that the civilization that came out of Jerusalem, Athens, Rome and London to be the crowning achievement of mankind will mourn its passing.

Buchanan, like all of the great right-wing propagandists wraps this swill in the cloak of the great struggle of civilizations, his column’s title conjures up memories of the mass murdering Christian Anders Breivik who wrote an Atlas Shrugged sized manifesto that also used a year, 2083 in his case to draw attention to a darkly racist message. The only way that the right-wingers, especially the thoroughly fascist Republican party can win is to play to the racists, this has been largely true since the days when LBJ ‘lost the south for a generation’ and has been getting ever more virulent since. This is a dangerous strategy now that there are the seeds of social unrest percolating thanks to the failure of the American capitalist imperialist warfare state, the GOP would gladly pour on the gasoline and strike the match.

Hey, this stuff plays in the south and has roused the rabble down behind the cornbread curtain ever since the Republicans seized on the volcanic eruption of white resentment courtesy of the Civil Rights Movement. Richard M. Nixon, who was the last liberal president that has presided over the United States became famous for his divisive politics, Rick Perlstein’s brilliant book Nixonland. Were every racist plank to be removed from the Republican party platform the entire fucking thing would collapse.

The Republicans have institutionalized racism since the days of Nixon’s infamous Southern Strategy. It was a plan that sought to divide and conquer by fomenting racial enmity. It was immensely successful in charting the path to GOP power by capitalizing on the festering resentment in the deep south over their being forced to accept their ‘devils’ as equals instead of relegating them to subhuman status. The epitome of the charlatan as politician that was Ronald Reagan tapped into this when in 1980 he shamelessly pandered to the peckerwoods in Philadelphia, MS the site of the 1964 murder of three civil rights workers. The film Mississippi Burning was based on that tragic incident where animosity and raw hate combined in brutal murder that opened the eyes of a nation in torment to the cruelty and repression within. The Gipper used this carefully chosen forum to continue the sly peddling of the demagogy of race baiting that would form the cement for the next quarter century of disastrous conservative rule:

“I believe in states’ rights. I believe we have distorted the balance of our government today by giving powers that were never intended to be given in the Constitution to that federal establishment”

Preached doddering Dutch to the delight of hordes of sweaty, knuckle draggers assembled at the Neshoba County Fair.

The importance of Reagan’s speech was the inclusion of the code word ‘states rights’ being newspeak that fanned the flames of racism. The late Lee Atwater admitted as much in a 1981 interview with historian Alexander P. Lamis that was published in his book Southern Politics in the 1990s:

Atwater: As to the whole Southern strategy that Harry Dent and others put together in 1968, opposition to the Voting Rights Act would have been a central part of keeping the South. Now [the new Southern Strategy of Ronald Reagan] doesn’t have to do that. All you have to do to keep the South is for Reagan to run in place on the issues he’s campaigned on since 1964… and that’s fiscal conservatism, balancing the budget, cut taxes, you know, the whole cluster…

Questioner: But the fact is, isn’t it, that Reagan does get to the Wallace voter and to the racist side of the Wallace voter by doing away with legal services, by cutting down on food stamps…?

Atwater: You start out in 1954 by saying, ‘Nigger, nigger, nigger.’ By 1968 you can’t say ‘nigger’ – that hurts you. Backfires. So you say stuff like forced busing, states’ rights and all that stuff. You’re getting so abstract now [that] you’re talking about cutting taxes, and all these things you’re talking about are totally economic things and a byproduct of them is [that] blacks get hurt worse than whites.

And subconsciously maybe that is part of it. I’m not saying that. But I’m saying that if it is getting that abstract, and that coded, that we are doing away with the racial problem one way or the other. You follow me – because obviously sitting around saying, ‘We want to cut this,’ is much more abstract than even the busing thing, and a hell of a lot more abstract than ‘Nigger, nigger.’

Atwater incidentally was the man who as a campaign strategist for Poppy Bush was behind the lowball sleaze of the Willie Horton commercials that helped to bring down Michael Dukakis in the 1988 election. Atwater’s protégé, the rotund fiend Karl Rove took it to the next level in knee-capping John McCain during the 2000 primaries with a South Carolina smear campaign that he had fathered a black child out of wedlock and current onslaught is exemplified by the bigots in the Tea Party with their Obama Joker minstrel posters. The racism sells with the freaks though, especially those in the south whose anger and willful ignorance have fucked their inbred families for generations.

In the film Mississippi Burning, Agent Rupert Anderson played by Gene Hackman, a good ole boy who had renounced the racism of his upbringing mused aloud:

Where does it come from, all this hatred? You know, when I was a little boy… there was an old Negro farmer lived down the road from us, name of Monroe. And he was… Well, I guess he was just a little luckier than my daddy was. He bought himself a mule. That was a big deal around that town. My daddy hated that mule. His friends kidded him that they saw Monroe ploughin’ with his new mule… and Monroe was gonna rent another field now that he had a mule. One morning that mule just showed up dead. They poisoned the water.

After that there was never any mention about that mule around my daddy. One time we were drivin’ past Monroe’s place and we saw it was empty. He’d just packed up and left, I guess. Gone up North or somethin’. I looked over at my daddy’s face….and I knew he’d done it. And he saw that I knew. He was ashamed. I guess he was ashamed. He looked at me and he said…”If you ain’t better than a nigger, son, who are you better than?”

Buchanan is among the last of a dying breed and the dinosaur who drank Wild Turkey with Hunter S. Thompson is not going to be sucked into the tar pit without a struggle. His contemporary G. Gordon Liddy, also getting ready to pass into history was always a no bullshit guy when it came to his true sentiments as well. I especially liked the following expression of his burgeoning for a newly discovered idol from his autobiography Will where he speaks wistfully of how the Liddy family maid, Teresa inculcated in the young whelp an adoration of Der Führer:

One day Teresa was excited. He was going to be on the radio. Just wait till I hear him speak! Eagerly, I joined her at the Emerson [radio]. First the music, the now familiar strains of a song that started, “Die Fahne hoch…” – Raise the banner…” It was a rousing, powerful anthem the Horst Wessel song.

We could tell he was about to speak. The crowd could hardly contain itself. They hailed him in the huge swelling ovations that carried me along. Sieg!”someone would shout, and what seemed like all the people in the world would answer with a roar, “Heil!”. For he was their leader, Der Führer, Adolf Hitler.

Hitler’s voice started out calmly, in low, dispassionate tones, but as he spoke of what his people would accomplish, his voice rose in pitch and tempo. Once united, the German people could do anything, surmount any obstacle, rout any enemy, achieve fulfillment. He would lead them; there would be one people, one nation, one leader. Here was the very antithesis of fear – sheer animal confidence and the power of will. He sent an electric current through my body and, as the massive audience thundered its absolute support and determination, the hair on the back of my neck rose and I realized suddenly that I had stopped breathing.

Liddy’s love affair with full-blown Nazism would go on and he allegedly once arranged for a showing of Leni Riefenstahl’s famous propaganda film Triumph of the Will to fellow fascist worshippers in the White House. At least the old school guys from Nixon’s administration had a strange sort of integrity in that they are unabashed about their bigotry. Compared to the young Turks, third-rate hacks like Florida’s Senator Marco Rubio who was once a teabagger darling but has recently come under fire by the birthers about his ability to serve as president and who has come under fire for lying about his parents alleged flight from Cuba guys like Pat Buchanan and G.Gordon Liddy are giants.

Rubio, an anchor baby and a freak like Herman Cain, the former food service lobbyist and pizza CEO are the faces of the front of the GOP now. Herman Clown’s fifteen minutes are just about over. Just go and check out some of the sentiment towards him from the hard core, sixth generation racists behind the cornbread curtain. Good show and very entertaining because this guy is so arrogant a buffoon that he doesn’t even see that he is being used to minimize the exposure of the crazies like Bachmann, Gingrich and Santorum. He is like the drunk uncle who shows up at Thanksgiving and craps his pants at the dinner table and then wonders why nobody wants any sweet potato pie for dessert.

Jolly good show, that’s all it is for Herman Clown or as he is referred over to a certain very popular heavily Republican leaning blog “Herman Coon”. The GOP would be like a Hezbollah suicide bomber if they actually rolled this turkey out as their candidate and they know it. Take some of these comments from the real right-wingers, the ones who vote:

18. Why the pizza nigger can never win: His supposed rise in GOP polls is just a ploy, the result of Repubs trying to prove to their left-wing accusers that they’re not racist just because they hate Obongo; He has yet to be nationally vetted. Once he is, it will come out that he’s done the typical TNB: fathered a love child, muh diked white former employees, misused funds, committed tax fraud, etc.; He runs on being this great bidnessman … so why did the board of Godawful’s Pizza fire his nigger ass? (Plus, he was only hired so the company could qualify for fed grants requiring minority management.); The nigger had stage 4 colon and liver cancer, had surgery, but at 66 he’s basically a dead nigger walking, not healthy enough for public office; He’s way too primitive a nigger. Unlike the high yellow Harvard edumacated Obongo, the coal black cone-headed Cain went to all nigger Morehouse College. Morehouse. Can you get more nigger than that?

19. You would think people would have learned by now that a nigger can’t handle the job of POTUS. If it comes down to nigger vs nigger, we will be in deep doo doo. Herman coon has its 999 plan. 9% national tax on purchased goods. This on top of your local and state tax will put everyone in the poor house. We all know that as CEO of nigger king and babydaddy pizza, it was the humans that did all the work and turned the company around. At this time we have a one drop rule nigger in the White House. If we end up with a full blown nigger in charge the entire country will end up a ghetto.

20. The problem here is that the first nigger president has turned out to be such a disaster. The libs and the left and every one suffering from white mans guilt just cannot admit to it being such a bad idea. So they say it is not that he is a nigger. It is that Obongo was not up to the job. So they scramble to place another nigger in office. This they say will prove once and for all “when he wins” that they really are just like us. Problem is that the nigger will just continue to run her into the ground. Then what will they do? Four more years of closing their eyes and chanting “We are the world?” Or will some sense of sanity finally emerge from this modern day dark age?

Even the hard core white supremacists of the GOP base, the Neo-Nazis laugh at the stupid teabaggers. Come on, do you really think that G. Gordon Liddy would ever vote for “Herman Coon”? It does say one thing, the far right as in the REAL far right is as sick of this fucked up oligarchy as we all are and Herm Cain, Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, Rick Perry and the rest of the Punch and Judy candidates in the two party game of three card monte are pretty much despised as bagmen for the plutocrats by those who know that the game has been rigged.

Still this is the big melting pot of America and the racist hatred has immense crossover appeal due to recent events as well as the immense structural damage to the prospects of working American families due to the class warfare that began under the sainted Reagan. The economic resentment over the gutting of the economy by outsourcing, offshoring and importing cheap labor to as the talking point goes ‘do the jobs that Americans won’t do’ has created a cottage industry for trashing Mexicans and illegal immigrants.So the time bomb that is America in late 2011, a country betrayed by it’s corrupt leaders, a failed political system and an economic disaster thanks to cancerous capitalism continues to tick. The Republicans will seek to tap into the primal animosity that is racism just long enough to regain control of the spoils system but even they won’t be able to control the rising tide of social foment. God forbid that the white folks can’t continue to be dominant in America, I find it a flaming bag of Republican hypocrisy in failing to take into account how the original indigenous inhabitants of this land were slaughtered, cheated and driven from their lands into ghettos called reservations. 

Pat Buchanan again is thrashing in a tar pit as he is conscious of his own extinction and no amount of race baiting is going to help, even in Chumpland you can only sell bullshit for so long until all but the dumbest of fuckers start to catch on.

As the man in the movie No Country For Old Men so eloquently put it – ‘You can’t stop what’s coming”

Just my two cents


The Next Best Thing to the Rapture: Tebow Named Broncos Starter

“We must respect the other fellow’s religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.”

– H.L. Mencken

The stadium was rocking and rolling just like old Mile High used to last Sunday after a loss that dropped the woebegone Denver Broncos to 1-4 and only a bad Marvin Lewis call and a fourth down stop away from winless the place was going fucking berserk.  You would have thought that the Broncos had just won the AFC Championship Game. Back in the day when it actually meant something to be a diehard Bronco fan any loss would have had a surly crowd booing and looking for blood as they filed out of the place, the parking lots would be full of mean drunks and there would be fights and arrests. They used to take their football real seriously in the Mile High City and the Broncos were like a religion to many but that is a bygone era. Today it has degenerated into a freakish stew of yuppies, know-nothings and religious pilgrims more interested in a cult of personality than any of the real action on the field.

The jubilation was because the new Christ, Timothy Richard Tebow had finally been able to banish that reviled Kyle Orton to the bench and had come into the game to throw for a whopping 79 yards as the Broncos rallied from behind to put a scare into the haughty Phillip Rivers and the hated division rival San Diego Chargers. Orton was absolutely hideous, managing only 34 yards passing and a pick before he was given the hook. Let’s face it, there iss just no way to defend the guy anymore, never a playmaker to begin with his psyche had been crushed weeks ago by the incessant torment of the Tebow worshippers. Once in the game, never mind that Tebow looked pathetic until late when San Diego was in playing not to lose mode. It took an ESPN play of the week type acrobatic catch by soon to be ex-Bronco, Pro Bowl receiver Brandon Lloyd as well as an official review to keep that last drive alive. Lloyd for his part has now officially been placed on the trading block, his earlier critical comments about the “Tebow thing” were likely deemed to be of sufficiently blasphemous nature to have him exorcised from the locker room. Tebow finished 4 of 10 for 79 yards, 28 on a dump off pass to Know-show Moreno for a TD, another 31 to a wide open receiver while San Diego was in the prevent defense and the 20 to Lloyd. Otherwise the great one competed one pass to Eric Decker for no gain. Jesus Fucking Christ has the bar been set low in Denver since the John Elway days. Tebow did run for a score which is about the only goddamned thing that does well; any lesser being coming out of college ball would have been converted to H-Back, an area of sore need for Denver anyway. Nonetheless, the place was going amok because the larger battle had been won and the Religious Right had their man in his new role and the accompanying national media swoon would ensure that stadiums across the country would be their pulpit.

One loon actually conjured up the Roman legend of Horatio or Publius Horatius Cocles, the 6th Century army office who held back the invading hordes of Clusium at the Pons Sublicius bridge. Horatius Cocles valiant stand became legend, somehow in their innate ignorance and usual stupid overestimation of their own self-importance the hordes of Jesus freaks in their number 15 orange jerseys seem to have created some sort of alternate universe where usurping the hapless stumblebum Kyle Orton is equivalent. Orton has been fucked from the get go, it was a losing battle and like Sisyphus he had one hell of a rock to roll. The rock started to roll back on the poor clod well before his phantom fumble against the hated Raiders in the season opener and had already crushed the hapless bastard into pulp by the time that he was given the hook after throwing for a miserable 39 yards against the Chargers on Sunday. Defenses looked into his eyes and saw a haunted and doomed man, at the time of his ouster he was tied for the NFL lead in interceptions with the notorious dog murderer Michael Vick. The doomstruck Orton was trying to hold back a force of nature, something that is still badly misunderstood by the sports analysts but to those who deal with the menace of Christian fascism on a regular basis it is crystal clear. The chants of TEBOW are at least somewhat understandable in Denver where other than during the John Elway era the backup quarterback is always the most popular guy on the team. Orton’s immense failure would have fans in any city bellowing for him to be pulled, but when the chants erupted in the waning minutes of a road loss to the Packers at hallowed Lambeau Field it should have been obvious to all but the blindest of blind what this is really all about.

While the newspaper columnists in Denver, notably the longtime reigning king of local sportswriting Woody Paige of the Denver Post sang the praises of Tebow, gloating and in even placing the onus on whether the most overrated college quarterback to turn pro since Akili Smith would be successful on the coaching staff. Paige has had a colossal hard-on for new coach John Fox for some reason, likely Fox wasn’t sufficiently deferential to the great one as well as having some sort of maniac interest in promoting Tebow at the expense of the team itself. It will be interesting to see how the rest of the season is spun so that every Tebow turnover, every into the dirt or otherwise errant pass and every stalled drive isn’t really poor Timmy’s fault at all, you see, when you have been anointed by God himself there are growing pains. Even Jesus Christ wandered in the wilderness for years before he emerged as the messiah and old Moses himself was raising sheep for an extended period before he smited Pharaoh and parted the Red Sea. As long as the Broncos win 3 or 4 games the rest of the year it will be the greatest moment in Broncodom since Elway hoisted the Lombardi Trophy in Miami.

There have been dissenters though, heathens and non-believers and questioners of the power of the shrine. Take for example this by a Fox Sports guy named Jason Whitlock, his email box must have been assaulted by a plague of locusts over these words in his piece Don’t Let Tebow Hype Fool You:

Maybe Tim Tebow is a football force of nature, the answer to Denver’s mile-high longing for the next John Elway. But it’s going to take more than a screen pass, a 12-yard TD scramble, constant fist-pumping and yelling and a moral victory to convince me.

I hope I don’t get struck by lightning or my Tebow-loving, colleague Jen Engel for writing that.

I’m not for or against Touchdown Timmy. I’m a Kansas City-fed, Show Me State, fence-sitting skeptic when it comes to the religious symbol/Broncos quarterback. You have to show me more than a 4-of-10, 79-yard passing half to get my heart racing about a Tebow Era.

I was stunned Sunday night when none other than Tony Dungy declared on NBC’s “Football Night In America” that Denver coach John Fox had to start Tebow in two weeks after Denver’s bye in the aftermath of the Broncos’ 29-24 close loss against San Diego. Dungy, while a religious zealot, is a stone-cold football man, a methodical, by-the-books, measured coach. He’s not given to succumbing to emotion or public sentiment.

But he’s now apparently caught Tebow religion thanks to a screen pass that Knowshon Moreno turned into a 28-yard TD scamper, a Tebow run for another score and the intangible-reliant belief the Broncos played harder when Touchdown Timmy was yelling and screaming.

Dungy fell for the hype. It makes sense. He’s removed from the fire. He’s on TV now. He’s like the rest of America. We believe that whatever the last entertaining thing we saw on the boob tube is infinitely better than whatever we saw before.

Sorry. I’m in a very cynical mood today. Touchdown Timmy reminds me of the AMC drama “Breaking Bad,” the show idiots claim is on the verge of replacing “The Wire” as the greatest in television history. “Breaking Bad” aired its Season 4 finale a couple of hours after Tebow flung his final incomplete pass into the end zone.

Yelling, screaming and fist-pumping are intangibles and motivational techniques best used by assistant coaches and middle linebackers. They have limited value on the offensive side of the ball. Defense is emotional. Offense is intellectual. Ray Lewis can’t play quarterback. And Peyton Manning can’t play middle linebacker.

In a pass-happy league where Cam Newton came out of the box throwing for 400 yards, let’s not get carried away because Touchdown Timmy threw for 79.

Denver doesn’t have a quarterback controversy. It has a QB crisis.

The reference to Tony Dungy is of interest since the former Buccaneers and Colts coach has managed to  somehow become a revered sort of football oracle. Never mind that Dungy’s Tampa Bay teams were never able to get over the hump under the great football leadership of the man mockingly referred to by some locals as “the black Spock”. Dungy’s defenses in Tampa were of all time great quality but his inability to ever figure it out offensively doomed him to exile after his team quit on him in the playoffs for the second year against the Eagles in that concrete rat trap in Philly. Dungy was snapped up by the Indianapolis Colts to replace Mr. Coors Light Commercial Jim Mora. In Indy despite having Peyton Manning as his quarterback his teams racked up exactly one Super Bowl win, and that one should have an asterisk because Rex Grossman was the opposing team’s quarterback. Dungy is a sanctimonious sack of shit, a religious fanatic who in the past has lent his name to virulently anti-gay organizations and a media whore. He is no authority on the Tebow thing, his piety and failure to ever find a quarterback in Tampa other than Trent Dilfer or Shaun King disqualifies him as anything but another asshole with an opinion.

So Tim Tebow’s shepherding of the Broncos will ironically begin next Sunday in the same stadium where John Elway won Super Bowl XXXIII and then retired from playing football. If there is a seriously winnable game on the Broncos schedule the remainder of the season this is it. Miami is a disaster, earlier in the year rumored as a potential partner in a Kyle Orton trade that would have left Tebow the starter from the get go the Dophins have stank up the place this season. The key free agent acquisition, former Saints running back Reggie Bush, more famously known for the monstrously unseemly scandal during his college days at USC than his NFL accomplishments has to put it diplomatically sucked. The Dolphins also lost their starting quarterback Chad Henne to a season ending injury and likely will trot out journeyman backup Sage Rosenfels under center. Miami is 0-4 pending Monday night’s game in the New Jersey swamplands against Rex Ryan’s Jets, a team looking to unload a very serious can of whup ass on someone after three straight crushing road losses. The Dolphins will be lucky to get out of there alive and will surely have the living shit beaten out of them by a Jets defense looking to emerge from it’s recent funk. They will be getting Denver on a short week and at home where they are in inexplicable 1-9 over their last ten games in Sun Life Stadium.It gets worse quickly after that, the resurgent Lions come to town as do the Jets and Patriots. Really the only other sure win on the slate is a week 13 game against the dismal Vikings. In an interesting note Jay Cutler, whose petulance and pouting set into motion the chain of events that led to Tebow being given the keys to the team comes to Denver on December 11, it would be a huge humiliation if he is able to beat the Broncos. But humiliation and a masochistic tendency for self-destruction are now requirements to be a Broncos fan, it is going to take years of being a league doormat and wandering in the football wilderness led by Tebow before anything changes. For the NFL, the networks and owner Pat Bowlen it all comes down to merchandise, concession and ticket sales, if they can sell the place out while putting out a product with the collective talent of an arena league team then they will do it. And the suckers in their number 15 jerseys will eat it up and empty their wallets.

Tebow’s Florida Gators championship teams will also be honored at the Dolphins game, it is damned near assured that there will be a national television audience and it should be practically a guaranteed win for the Broncos. It’s a game that not even Orton could have fucked up so what barring serious injury will be the opening game in a long and dark period in Broncos history under Tebow should be a certain victory no matter how badly that Denver plays. The real nightmare for real Broncos fans will be if Tebow is able to win several games and finish 6-10 or so. There is no way in hell that Elway and Fox will be able to draft a quality starting quarterback in next April’s draft because now that they have already surrendered to the Tebow cult they will forever be enslaved by it.


Sucky Fucky: That would pretty much describe Kyle Orton and the already floating in the shitter Broncos season but it brings to mind lurid tales from the past as well, it was the “Horatio” comparison that did it.

I used to have a buddy named Horatio Hicks, or Horace Hicks, which was the name on his birth certificate. He was a tall, lanky piece of work, a real oddball who always wore hiking boots, heavy metal band t-shirts and denim overalls and had slicked back hair, he went through the pomade in a day when letting it grow out was fashionable. He also had a schnozzle so big that we called him “Horse” which he dug. He always would boast that his penis was as big as a horse’s and when the mood hit him, he would on occasion unzip his jeans, extract it and wave it around. He loved to go through fast food drive through windows with it out and if it was late enough, after a night of heavy boozing and doping he would play with it until it was erect and then laugh hysterically when the poor night girl at Jack In The Box would notice. It was actually pretty repulsive but in this sorry day of foul social deviance, rampant boy-buggering by once respected institutions like the Catholic Church and the proclivity of perverts and freaks to engage in not only sexual crimes but often murder and dismemberment it was in a way quite innocent, at least by 2011 standards.

He was another of the miscreants from the old days, a childhood friend who I happened to hang around with well into my early adult years. Horse was a party animal with a mean streak, one day he drop-kicked his own father in the balls over some money that he had borrowed from the old man – Horse used it to buy pot of course.  He was a dopehead to the nth degree, hell, a lot of my old friends were, we grew up in the 1970s, the last decade when Americans actually were taught to think critically and challenging authority of the lemming colony wasn’t deigned to be tantamount to treason.  Horse was into the tittie bars too. He pissed away nearly all of his money at Denver area flesh emporiums like Shotgun Willies, P.T.’s, Boogie Down, The Landing Strip, Pecos Junction and Doug’s Place. Many of these are likely now long defunct but Shotgun Willie’s was the Mecca of Mile High City gentleman’s clubs and still is. Horse would get good and jacked up on Yukon Jack and devil weed (he also was a speed freak), stuff his overall pockets with a roll of one dollar bills and hit the circuit. The girls who knew him loved him, he was a tipper who reliably could be counted on to piss away all of his money on lap dances and ogling enormous sets of the pink-nosed puppies being massaged an inch in front of his face. He would disappear for long stretches of time during his soirees, likely to go and jack off in order to bleed off the pressure lest he explode in his fruit of the looms.

One night I was with Horse at a place out in Commerce City on the way to the old Stapleton Airport called the Landing Strip. This was one of the raunchier tittie bars on the circuit, the girls there weren’t as managed as they were at some of the other more prominent clubs who were not about to run afoul of the law by allowing actual physical contact to occur. The majority of them were biker chicks and their old men were often in the place drinking, there was no problem as long as they were not molested or groped in any serious way by the patrons. For some reason “Horse” had a particularly nasty gleam in his eye that night, maybe he was backing down the Yukon Jack with black beauties or something. As the heavy metal music blared, Horse was violating the rules of strip clubs, he was going for it, flicking his tongue at nipples and at one point he even grabbed a handful of ass. I was watching the table of four or five leather clad, bearded dudes who looked like the thuggish roadies of the early day Allman Brothers Band (there is a picture of them on the insert inside the Fillmore Concerts cd) the one who seemed the most pissed off bore more than a passing a resemblance to Gregg Allman himself.

I often wondered what Horse would have been like were he to have ever visited Subic Bay in the Philippines as I did back when I was a youngster in the U.S. Navy. Club Jolo sat at the end of Magsaysay Drive, the long main drag of Olongapo City running from the Subic Bay Naval Base over the infamous Shit River and populated by hundreds of bars/whorehouses. Of all of the nastiest of the nasty dives in the P.I. this one was by far the gold standard. It was totally nude dancing in front of one of those psychedelic style back screens where hippie style swirls and lights were interspersed with some of the sickest porn that existed. There were 8 mm projections of a woman fucking a pig, a series of various objects being crammed into anal and vaginal orifices and even a toilet cam style scat view. Of course the stuff was so perverted that it really was a turn off but it served to reinforce Club Jolo’s legendary among Pacific fleet sailors as the raunchiest bar of all. They would actually have girls who would come table side, stack pesos on a beer bottle, squat and suck them into their cooze. That act  was a huge hit with the customers, all of them U.S. military members, drunk off of their asses on the fabled local concoction mojo and eager to engage in primal style fornication with the “little brown fuck machines (LBFM’s) that made Subic Bay the top port of call. Horse would have run absolutely amok in the adult “Disneyland” as it was known to those in the U.S. Navy.

But I digress….

I looked over at Horse and was horrified to see that in between the dancers that he had stood up and had actually extracted his cock. He had laid it out on the little buffer area behind his pack of Marlboros and his beer, you couldn’t see it unless you were either right next to him or looking down. Even more distrubing was that Goddammit, the crazy fucker had pasted a set of those little googlie eyes that you buy at arts and crafts store on the head of his dick!  I muttered something and immediately started eying the clearest path to the exit. He was just standing there leering with a dollar bill folded up and extending from his mouth as the bleached blonde girl on stage slowly gyrated her way towards him, her meat globes a bouncing. She sashayed over to Horse and closed those things over the dollar bill, she then looked down, noticed his crank on the stage padding, recoiled and screamed. The bikers were up and split into pairs, with military like precision two of them cut through the pool table area to come at us from the right and the others through the restroom area to descend from our left. I grabbed Horse by the back of his overalls and growled “LET’S GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE NOW!!!” while I started to violently and quickly pull him towards the door, his dick was still hanging out and there was about ten dollars in ones sitting there as we bolted. He quickly saw the writing on the wall and we both broke into a sprint, out the door and into the parking lot. We were in the car, a 1984 Dodge Daytona throwing up gravel on the way out of the lot as those biker dudes emerged from the place along with another longhaired dude in cook’s whites who was brandishing a large meat cleaver, it was the blue neon lights glint off of that fucking potential murder weapon that haunts me to this day. Fortunately the I-70 highway access ramp was only a block or from the bar so by the time that they would have been in hot pursuit we were already long gone, laughing madly at the entire situation.

I lost touch with Horse over twenty years ago and have made no attempt to contact him since because some things and people are best left in the past, especially when it comes to hardened reprobates like Horse. For all that I know he is doing time in Canon City for waving his dick at little girls on a playground, frankly given his deep degenerate streak it wouldn’t surprise me a bit. The last time that I talked to him, not long after the escape from what would have been a brutal beating in the parking lot at The Landing Strip he was managing a combination arcade/headshop out on East Colfax and dealing dope out of the back door, he also dabbled in burglary and got a real kick out of preying on gays and the elderly. Were I to venture a guess I would certainly say that no good came of him, he was a seriously twisted dude. Then again, perhaps he ‘reformed’ himself and found God, as the saying goes, “religion is the last refuge of a soundrel”, he may even have been in attendance at Sunday’s game wearing an orange Tim Tebow jersey. Who the fuck knows… and in the end who the fuck cares?

So why the fuck am I going off on this riff about Horace Hicks in the first place? It was just that the dysfunction on the Broncos and the fairly recent DUI bust of Denver kicker Matt Prater on his way back home from Shotgun Willie’s dredges up the corpses of the past. The present is the time when the serious monsters are on the prowl, they have taken over the political system and the vomitous torrent of cultural sleaze that emanates from the electronic crackpipe is only surpassed by the militant societal perversion of American Cristendom. This potent mixture is exemplified by the Great TebowCrusade and the swarming of what passes for a sports media to descend upon it like buzzards or more appropriately heathen bastards worshipping their false idols and golden calves. As a force they are not to be trifled with, just ask Kyle Orton whose elderly years will likely be spent wracked by cold night sweats and the nightmares thanks to how the animals treated him over the last four months. I have no doubt that many of them prayed for the death of his new child just so Tebow could be anointed the starter, that’s just the way that the putrescent fuckers are. They are pro life but worship war, the death penalty and have no qualms with poor children starving to death, I often wonder what Jesus would think of this scum… I sure as fuck know that they wouldn’t have been down with his long-haired, liberal ass.

Hell, what is more hypocritical than Pastor Ted getting plowed up the back forty on a regular basis while denouncing gays like an establishment version of the cruder Fred Phelps? Or Reverend Gary Aldridge, my all time favorite homophobic Christer who was found dead, suffocated in a Pulp Fiction style Gimp leather suit with a massive dildo stuffed up his asshole. Really, these rotten Christers, especially the Tebow worshippers are as full of shit as Reverend Aldridge’s lubed up anus was full of pink vulcanized rubber. The triumph of Tebow is a tale of the triumph of a very militant element that has existed within this country, on of enormous political power and on that the average American Joe has no true idea even exists. Of course her in Der Heimat, circa 2011 the Average Joe is a jacked up on anti-Muslim hatred, self-centered, willfully ignorant rock-headed buffoon like Joe the Plumber so none of this resonates nor could it. Jesus Tebow’s ascension is especially significant in that it came in the exact same venue that the loathed BLACK man in the WHITE House claimed the nomination for the Democratic Party back in 2008. While Americans in general seem to be doomed to never realize one of the central tenets upon which the United States of America was founded – that religion and politics don’t mix, perhaps by the end of the season Bronco fans will realize that neither do religion and football.

Uncle Tom’s Pizza Cabin

Tea Party Lawn Jockey Herm Cain Attacks Occupy Wall Street Protests

Nobody is playing the Spiro Agnew role in the Nixon playbook to discredit the rapidly growing Occupy Wall Street protests as lazy, hippies and of course Commies than tea house Negro Herman Cain. Cain, the angry black man out to protect the interests of the 1 % who are the owners of the lemming plantations has been on fire the last few days spewing vicious rhetoric. Of course it’s all bullshit but this really matters nothing to the moronic teabaggers, many of whom have adopted Cain as their beloved pet coon in a completely dishonest and cynical attempt to prove that they aren’t racist despite all evidence otherwise since Obama took up his official residence in the WHITE House. Of course Herman Cain, the king of that Alpo on toast garbage pizza that is sold in gas stations will never be president and he knows it, he is just demagoguing his way to a big payday and a career as a FOX pundit. Right now, riding high after his victory in the meaningless Florida straw poll of party activists (aka: teabagger losers) Herr Cain has been barnstorming to sell his ghostwritten book, from what turned out at a local Barnes and Noble a bunch of white saps, suckers and bluehairs who haven’t shelled out coin for a shelf decoration since Glenn Beck’s last idiotic opus. Cain is going to milk this for all that it’s worth and as a self-proclaimed Horatio Alger style proof of the greatness of capitalism will shift seamlessly from his strident anti-Muslim diatribes into attacks on the fucked over victims of corporate and bankster greed. 

It is actually humorous to see this silly little man barking like a yappy dog at a coming storm, all of Herman Meunster cheese’s name-calling and class-war diatribes just aren’t going to resonate. I have found many of the comments on the boards to pretty funny, outside of the nickle a post RNC trolls of course. This one from a Yahoo story pretty much nails good ole Herm dead on:

Cain wants to hire you for minimum wage with no benefits to deliver pizzas for him…you have to have your own vehicle though, and buy your own gas. If you get robbed/shot Cain will send his best wishes to your family and send someone to retreive your blood-stained uniform to be washed and re-used. Good luck kids!…actually many of the folks delivering pizzas these days are in their 40’s/50’s.

That truly sums it up, it brings to mind a letter that a middle-aged man who was forced to rely on the sort of lousy work that is available thanks to our venerable “job creators” like Herman Cain. I will post this in it’s entirety below. For context I might add that this was a few years back before the economy had really cratered thanks to the pigs on Wall Street.:

I have now found out what it takes to be hired as a minimum wage ($6.67 per hour in Florida) delivery driver at a Pizza Hut take out, delivery, and carry-out restaurant here in St. Pete. This is one of the smaller restaurants, and it does not even have “dine-in” facilities.

It takes the typical paperwork of filling out a job application, plus the paperwork of confirming one is either a U.S. citizen or qualified to work in the U.S.

But it also takes filling out an 80-question questionnaire.

Additionally, once one is hired, one is shown approximately 2 hours straight of corporate promotional videos on the Pizza Hut restaurants.

If one’s hiring manager is preoccupied with a manager of his own having come from outside the immediate chain to oversee him and ask him questions that day, one will have no training that day.

If one’s hiring manager tells one he will telephone you the next day to confirm he will be in the next day to give one training, and he does not give you that phone call, he simply does not give you that phone call. Then if you show up, and he is not there, he simply is not there.

If he fobs off the training that second day on a subordinate with a thousand different tasks that subordinate is performing, and if you show and the subordinate on whom the training’s fobbed off is put into the situation wherein the thousand different tasks interfere with his being able to adequately train you, you don’t get training and it’s preferred you leave before the end of your shift, so the company will save money on the paltry $6.67 per hour they are paying you; if you leave before the end of your shift that day, you simply don’t get paid.

Additionally, you are to wear black pants. And you are to purchase them yourself. The organization does not purchase them. You do. I purchased two pair, and they cost me $40.00 for the two at a Target.

Additionally, you must wear a certain kind of shoe, and you must purchase them. The organization does not purchase them. You do. I was told they could cost me up to $40.00, and the money would come out of my paycheck.

This is on a paycheck of minimum wage of $6.67 per hour.

Part of your responsibility — and you are told this in the promotional videos — is to “hustle.” They tell you, “hustle” from the restaurant to your car, and “hustle” from your car to the home of the customer who is receiving the delivery.

They also tell you to be careful of crime, because delivery drivers get victimized by criminals. But they also tell you, no firearms are allowed in the restaurant. I had a concealed firearms carrying license, and I did not reveal that to my hiring manager. While I was fully within my legal rights to carry my concealed firearm, since I had a Florida concealed firearms carrying license, the restaurant tells employees in a restaurant that handles cash, and employees who handle cash when they deliver to customers, no firearms. This is sort of like telling a seal to swim glibly and gayly and utterly without a care within an ocean full of great white sharks.

The interesting thing was, when I came for my first day on the job, I was sent to the back of the Pizza Hut restaurant. The hiring manager was there for that day, and he set me up in front of the video player, and had the 5 videos I was to sit and watch for the next several hours in front of me. He informed me that there was originally supposed to have been an orientation of 5 people, not 1 person, but I was the only one who, in his words, “worked out.”

The day previous to that day, I had met him at another restaurant where he was working to answer to his telephone call and he had said on that earlier occasion that I’d so far been the only one who had worked out.

Additionally, they give you a motor vehicle check, if you’re to be a delivery driver. And before hiring you, they check into your driving background. They did that with me, and again, apparently, I was the only one who checked out okay.

Their turnover rate is evidently so high that this sort of thing is conventional and typical with them.

After being there 2 days with no training, spending 40 bucks on two pairs of pants out of my own money, realizing I’d have to spend 40 more on shoes, realizing my car insurance was entirely my responsibility and if any accident I had happened, I could not only lose my job, but end up without car insurance, having had the hiring manager’s time primarily preoccupied the first day on the job by his manager from the outside coming in to check up on him, and then having had the hiring manager promise to call me the second day and confirm and show up the second day to train me, and then not do that, and showing up myself the second day and having the training responsibilities fobbed off by the hiring manager, who managed 82 stores total (this being only one of his stores), on some hapless and luckless subordinate, and being asked an 80-question questionnaire as a precondition to being employed at the sum of money of $6.67 per hour for a job which was apparently not even going to be full-time, I decided this would not work out.

I went to the restaurant the third day, turned in my new “uniform” in the shape of my shirt given me the previous day and my cap given me the previous day, and said, “I’m outta here, I quit.”

The hiring manager was there and he ran after me to stop me, and I yelled back, “You want reliability from your employees, but you’re supposed to be reliable yourself and you weren’t reliable and didn’t show up to train me. I quit.”

I said that loudly as I got into my car and drove away.

Hence ended my 2 shifts, one 4 hours, and one 3.5 hours, with Pizza Hut.

I am 60 years old, and, frankly, I simply could not take it

My point is, I have had my share of tough jobs. But this 2 days at Pizza Hut and the literally evil and horrendous way in which workers were demeaned into being considered nothing but cogs in the machinery of production of profits for the looters, thievers, pillagers, exploiters, and swine at the top of the establishment, and their well-paid agents in the management in the middle, was simply too much for me at 60 to take.

So I simply quit. I could not take it. And this may be my last experiment in trying to get work, because my money’s running out, and if I cannot find work soon, I will be homeless. I will not be homeless, and have already made “alternative plans” to the possibility of homelessness, which some already know of. After watching the City of St. Petersburg City Council and Mayor pass ordinances effectively criminalizing homelessness here in the City of St. Petersburg, I have decided, that if it’s a choice of homelessness or death, I will take death.

I never heard from him again, I don’t whether he ended up homeless or decided to keep his dignity and kill himself, it’s pretty fucking sad when this sort of desperation from a human being is expressed. What he says about St. Petersburg is largely true, the religious fanatic sociopath mayor, an authoritarian goon named Bill Foster has essentially declared a war against the homeless. This Mayor, ‘affectionately’ known by the nickname “Bananas Foster” is not a man to be messed with, after a recent tragedy that ended with two local police officers murdered Foster sent the bulldozers to destroy the family home of the shooter.  Kind of brings to mind the sort of total retaliatory fervor of the commanders who ordered the brutality of Lidice. St. Pete is a pretty fucked up place these days, a bunch of Bircher teabagger freaks on the county commission just brought a halt to the flouride that has been put in the local water supply. Considering the war on public education, teachers unions and the pederast style glee of Governor Rick Scott in throwing the entire state of Florida open to the carpetbaggers, looters and scoundrels one shudders what is coming next here in the diseased penis of America. Herman Cain by the way was a smash hit locally and the 2012 Republican Convention in Tampa promises to be the biggest collection of Nazis gathered in one location since the 1934 Nazi Congress in Nuremberg that Leni Riefenstahl immortalized in Triumph Of The Will

You know that Herman Cain is going to be there and be given a primo spot for a speaking. It is going to be the grandest carnival of perversion to hit this area since the Terri Schiavo circus. Word has it that Tampa authorities are trying to actually bring in unmanned drones to keep order as the crackdown is going to be enormous. There is going to be such a brute showing of force that the ‘Iron City’ Pittsburgh G-20 lockdown will look like Woodstock by comparison.
If Obama had any balls he would have a few of those drones armed to take out the Koch Brothers bus, their deal-cutting with Iran, a terrorist state and a country with a deranged leader that the media has insisted wants to see “Israel wiped off the face of the map” should make them legitimate targets as enemies of the state, they by any definition of the neocons would certainly be themselves Islamofascists if they are selling chemicals to Ahmadinejad. Hell, Obama has already set the precedent by dialing up the death of U.S. citizen Anwar al-Awlaki without due process. The treasonous Koch Brothers would certainly be fat targets if we are to be going after those who hate us for our way of life. 

As for Cain, it’s sardonically ironic that he would be playing Agnew when under Nixon’s Southern Strategy he couldn’t have gotten a White House gig shining Tricky Dick’s black loafers.

Tea Party Swine Squeal Over Occupy Wall Street Protests

Eric Ivan Cantor is Especially Concerned about Occupy Wall Street “Mobs”

The Occupy Wall Street protests have been an enormous success despite the media, especially the cadre of right-wing swine who made hay with their phony Tea Party insurgency are squealing now. With the movement gaining momentum and spreading across the country (we even had a gathering here in Tampa on Thursday) it is imperative for the plutocrats, the oligarchy and the neocon war machine to nip it in the bud before moribund and broken Americans get the seeds of an idea that they can take to the streets to force change. I am very pleasantly surprised by the success to this point of the nascent movement, I had become resigned to the thought that Americans would only rebel if Dancing With the Stars was suddenly cancelled, it is not that we don’t have more than our share of economically fucked folks whose futures have been stolen by the pigs on Wall Street but there isn’t the fire, or the character of peoples in other lands who are engaging in serious civil unrest. Even the corrupt corporate media was forced to cover the protests, the hypocrisy of CNN and FOX descending like buzzards to feature a dozen or so teabaggers gathered at a Waffle House with a few “Where’s My Birth Certificate?” signs on a near daily basis and then ignore thousands gathering at the nexus of greed and immorality that is ‘the street’ would have been just a bit too obvious of whose interest those guardians of free speech and a free press truly represent.

The Occupy Wall Street movement really hit it big on Friday when two of the most prominent national political charlatans, New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg and the insipidly slimy Republican Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R) – Tel Aviv took to the air to denounce the protests. Bloomberg, a reliable lackey for the banksters audaciously claimed that those who were basing their operation out of Manhattan’s Zuccotti Park were “destroying jobs”.  This is pretty fucking funny considering that the malefactors of great wealth who use their false legitimacy as “wealth creators” to peddle toilet bogus paper sold as “securities”, receive an endless supply of free money from the U.S. government that they then lend out at usurious interest rates to the same taxpayers who are being shaken down to finance their gambling schemes and target Main Street with their financial weapons of mass destruction. What is Bloomberg to say? He is fully owned by the banking cartels, he would never have become Mayor of the Big Apple otherwise. The financial terrorists have been for too long been looked upon as anything other than the predatory jackals that they are and the day is coming when things are going to be set right. The longer that the protests continue, the more nervous that the smug and arrogant pricks are going to become that the jig is up. As the economy continues to deteriorate and with the imminent default of Greece in the not too distant future blowing another hole in the global matrix of greed and fraudulent wealth we may soon be making something other than bogus investment paper and bombs in America again – guillotines.

The real indicator of just how serious that Occupy Wall Street and the associated protests springing up across the fruited plain would be that Eric Cantor, Netanyahu’s man in Congress has come out now and denounced the protesters as “mobs”. This is as hysterical as it is hypocritical, I didn’t see Cantor anywhere when his lynch mob of white racists, the Tea Party, a phony construct that is nothing more than a re-branding of the hard core haters of the Republican base post-Bush were gathered around the Capitol hectoring and spitting on black legislators who were voting on Obama’s heinous health care ‘reform’ backdoor bailout of the insurance parasites. Cantor is an interesting piece of work as I have previously noted, he is a key man in the upcoming GOP drive to make support for the monsters who are currently running the show in Israel as the central tenet in the 2012 elections. The phony Tea Party with it’s overwhelming percentage of Christian Zionists will be in full storm the beaches mode to ensure that the secret Muslim, the Antichrist and the Commie Barack Hussein Obama has his black ass ousted from the WHITE House come next November. Netanyahu and his cabal of blood drinking freaks are determined to attack Iran and need U.S. support to pull it off. Obama, for all of his failings has been an impediment to launching the strike that would be the opening act of World War III and Christ knows that the Rapture can’t come until the Middle East is engulfed by an apocalypse.

The Tea Party, already packed to the brim with useful idiots who would be overjoyed to pray with Rick Perry at a BBQ/Hank Williams Jr. concert down at “Niggerhead” for Obama’s sudden death (which would be an achievement because God didn’t give a rat’s ass about Perry’s prayers for rain) is a de facto arm of the Israeli right-wing government working to destabilize the United States from within. Anyone who is familiar with the power and tactics of the Israel Lobby understands that in Congress, fealty to God’s Chosen land is essential to hold office, fuck America, our corrupt representatives know who butters their bread – the banks, big money corporations and most importantly the fascist human rights abusing racist Apartheid state Israel. Tea Party king Glenn Beck has been laying low in the weeds while prepping for the rollout of the all in for Israel onslaught of the coming year, visiting Jerusalem and chumming around with CUFI’s Pastor John Hagee. No coincidence that these diseased rats have been increasingly gathering in Texas where Governor Rick Perry is being groomed as their Fuhrer figure.

Cantor has a wild hair up his ass because Occupy Wall Street is a real grass roots movement, it shatters the fraudulent Tea Party as an insurgency and the perception of the sheeple is critical, especially as the Obama v. Israel storyline is cemented into place by the right-wing media. Today the media has out of sheer desperation been saturated with the bullshit manufactured Solyndra scandal, the Republicans, in true style are launching an inquisition that will predictably end in calls for Obama’s impeachment. Solyndra also serves to drive the news cycle away from Occupy Wall Street and to get Americans focused back on what matters – being fleeced by the gangsters in government and on Wall Street and watching football. It is the hope of the power elite that by next week Occupy Wall Street have been flushed down the memory hole and when the media is away, the New York city cops will play, the skull-cracking will commence. Now the entire Solyndra thing is ludicrous for a number of reasons, the Republicans sure as hell never investigated war criminals Bush, Cheney and Rummy for their lies that led the U.S. into two never-ending wars costing trillions of dollars and resulting in thousands of American casualties, hundreds of thousands of dead non-Christian brown people and a military style dictatorship being built on American soil. Such things don’t matter to these pigs, Clinton wasn’t ever hauled in front of their silly tribunals for his ruinous trade pacts that contributed to today’s economic plight nor for dirty dealings with China. It was all bullshit about a Whitewater real estate deal gone sour and for lying about getting his dick sucked by a chubby little trollop. Obama keeps his snake in it’s cage so there is no sex scandal that would truly resonate with the masses of asses so they are now smacking him with the ridiculous Solyndra chicanery. It is also notable that Obama isn’t being investigated for the money that he received from Goldman Sachs and the preferential treatment that his administration has bestowed upon the giant vampire squid when it came to the bailouts. Of course the corruption on Wall Street doesn’t matter to the teabaggers, they only care about taking down Obama over dirty deals that their own Republican leadership don’t have a piece of.

Not only is it total bullshit that the Republican pigfuckers are pissing away more money on this witch hunt but they will not doing a damned thing to investigate Tea Party backers the Koch Brothers for breaking laws and dealing with none other than Iran. In a Bloomberg investigative piece that broke on Monday, the Kochs were outed for circumventing the law and bartering in chemicals with the evil country that according to the talking points wants to “wipe Israel off the face of the map”. This should be the huge scandal, especially since it involves the primary U.S. funders of the phony Tea Party who will be hammering the Obama won’t nuke Iran because he is a Muslim narrative on the campaign trail. Cantor can’t be thrilled with this revelation either, since he has been using his office to shill for the ultra vile Clarion Fund anti-Muslim activist outfit by screening propaganda films like Iranium, a sequel to the mass DVD distribution of Obsession: Radical Islam’s War Against the West. The venal and consolidated media won’t print anything else about the Koch  Brother’s Iran dealings, you can take that one to the bank, big money buys a lot of favorable coverage and the Koch’s are flush with it. The Koch brothers also have a huge interest in quashing the Occupy Wall Street protests, they are among the .00001 percent having inherited their fortunes from their Bircher daddy Fred’s dealings with Russian dictator Joseph Stalin.  Of course the teabaggers don’t care about any of this, they were also down with Bush’s grandfather who traded with Hitler.

And so it goes…. right now everything is dependent on the Wall Street protests continuing, this may be the best and last chance to slow down the fascist machine, it is imperative that all of us back these people who are in the streets to the best of our ability because the full fury of the corrupt system is about to be loosed upon them.

Just my two cents over the morning cup o’ joe


Tebow Agonistes & Palin’s Taste for the Dark Meat

Denver Ravaged By Tebola Virus

The national holy war, the cultural crusade and the right-wing fascist cancer that has fed on this country for decades, flying under the radar has poked up it’s ugly, devil-horned head in Denver. The ongoing crusade to bully the NFL’s Broncos into making the Manchurian Candidate that is Tim Tebow the staring quarterback is as evil as it gets from our domestic terrorist Christian jihadists. Of course Tebow can’t accurately throw the ball but hey, he is a nice kid, loves Jesus, has a best-selling book and once appeared in an anti-abortion Super Bowl commercial sponsored by the venomous, just downright un-American gay hating organization headquartered in Colorado Springs that is Focus On The Family. Radical cleric Jame Dobson’s hate group has much to do with the Denver demagoguery.
In an update on a previous post of mine, The Great Tebow Crusade: A Sports Metaphor for a Delusional Nation that was done prior to the opening kickoff I thought that it would be interesting to drop in on my old hometown once again. The entire sordid Tim Tebow affair is typical of the bullying and harassment of the American fascist political movement that is manifested in the Religious Right. What is going on in Denver right now is a rare opportunity for this sort of pernicious behavior to cross over into the mainstream for all to see. It is very similar to the Bristol Palin Dancing With The Stars shenanigans when the teabaggers/religious zealots nearly blew up ABC’s cash cow with their activism. Sad that in America that unless something happens to be disruptive to pro football or silly reality television it doesn’t get noticed, such is life in a sad land where celebrity is the coin of the realm and being butt-fuck stupid has risen to the level of dogma in one of the two major political parties.

While I largely passed for the most part on the NFL’s opening week 9/11 nationally televised carnivals of perversion I have as a longtime Broncos fan been watching the Tebow sideshow closely. With little boy Jesus relegated to the third string due to his inferior professional football skills (hell, if you can’t beat out Brady Quinn you have problems) the fervor of the cult has raged unabated. During the season opener in the recently renamed Sports Authority Field in Denver the home team laid a whopper of an egg against the hated Oakland Raiders, this being at least the third straight home loss to Al Davis’ team. Incumbent starter Kyle Orton once again couldn’t make a play down the stretch or in the red zone to save his life and during one drive had one of the most idiotic fumbles that I have seen in 45 years of watching football – he just dropped the fucking ball! The final score was only 23-20 this time, a huge improvement on last year’s 59-14 battering or the prior years ultimate humiliation on having Jamarcus Russell lead a team from behind but it was still a winnable game. The Tebow contingent, and naturally the pocket media that promotes the imbecility that he is a quality starting QB in the NFL. By the fourth quarter, when a homefield advantage led by a 80,000 fans making noise was for the most part erased by Tebow fans braying for their boy and booing Orton’s every move the deal was done and the season started out with the loss. I remember when the old Mile High Stadium was one of the most hated and feared venues in the league to play in. Opponents were intimidated by the din of Broncos (not Tebow) fans all cheering their team, making noise to discombobulate the opposition and stomping their feet on the old steel stands to rock the place as if it were in an earthquake. Not so anymore, as long as the Christers show up to try to cram their religious avatar and their political agenda down everyone’s throats the home field edge for a Denver team desperately in need of any help that they can get while rebuilding will be negated.

Disney Corporation’s Sportscenter on ESPN led off their Tuesday NFL coverage with one of their standard dim-witted, big-titted pretty girls spinning the Broncos v. Raiders game into an epic illusion that completely ignored the game, focused entirely on Orton’s fumble and then cut to shots of Aryan youth looking Tebow fans decked out in their orange number 15 jerseys chanting TEEEEE-BOWW juxtaposed with shots of Orton’s deer in the headlights look. More dishonest and out of context reporting by a network that had long ago jumped the shark and exists solely off of it’s past before it was devoured by Disney. I will grant the Tebowistas one thing, Orton does suck and more often than not exhibits all of the grace of a stork that is high on quaaludes while in the pocket. He can’t run, has to deal with a porous offensive line, has no running game to support him and the next clutch play that he makes will be the first yet he must feel like the Christers of old when they were trotted out by the Romans to be eaten by lions. In my opinion while overly sadistic and very gory it is a practice that deserves another look given the increasing militancy of American Christendom today.

But on and on it goes, the next big thing is that an out of state group is going to be spending money to put up two pro-Tebow billboards in Denver, taking their experience from the ruinous and ongoing culture war into the sports arena. These swine are pros when it comes to distraction, deceit and divisiveness and I can guarantee you that it won’t stop with the billboards. I am sure that Jesus would cough up the 10 k, it’s not like there are poor and starving children in Denver who could be better helped where the money donated to an organization that ministers to their needs. In a way though the team has nobody to blame but themselves for the Tebow thing, after all, ousted coach Josh McDaniels was given free reign over personnel decisions and he was duped into trading up and down to get Timmy to begin with. They also were completely happy to feature  those expensive number 15 jerseys that are made in other countries by sweatshop labor (really patriotic NFL merchandise) and promoted Tebow heavily in their marketing campaign for season ticket renewals despite the lockout. Pat Bowlen if nothing else is a shrewd businessman who understood that despite the season in limbo due to the lockout that the Jesus juicers being the suckers, rubes and schmucks that they are and always have been could be counted on to shell out their money for the second coming of Christ.

As it sits today, mid-week after Sunday’s latest game Tebow actually got onto the field against the Cincinnati Bengals on Sunday, which had thousands of his flock roaring their approval. But in a cruel crushing of their hopes and dreams numero 15 was only in the game as an emergency receiver, the Broncos had lost two more pass catchers to injury and needed a decoy. Tebow didn’t catch a pass nor was he targeted by the maligned Orton, I am sure that this week the Tebow cult will be crying that it was a devious trick by hated infidel coach John Fox who may soon find himself the target of one of those trademark right-wing whisper campaigns about his alleged fondness for Sharia law. The Broncos mercifully hit the road this week after eking out a 24-22 win, it will be a welcome departure from the ongoing distraction of the Tebow cancer.

Stay tuned for further developments in this ongoing saga.

“I know that white woman want some black dick”

When it comes to the Republican dogma of butt-fuck stupid there is no better face for the anti-intellectual movement that is America’s Khmer Rouge than Sarah Palin. The wild Alaskan moonbat is a modern day fable of white trash hitting it big in a way that the Clampett’s never could have imagined. Palin rocketed to national media stardom when she was selected in an amazing act of desperation by former presidential candidate and longtime blowhard John McCain as his vice presidential running mate during the 2008 campaign. Palin, a sly little Kewpie doll with Nixonian delusions of grandeur was a perfect head of the nascent know-nothing Tea Party Astroturf movement. She traveled the land saying the things that McCain just couldn’t or wouldn’t say about the BLACK man running on the Democratic party ticket. Palin’s rallies attracted the real dregs of society, the uber-bigoted religious rabble who sure as fuck weren’t about to tolerate a Negro in the WHITE House. Of course Palin began to get under the notoriously sensitive McCain’s skin and in an amazing act of raw hubris sought to give a concession speech/call to arms when Obama’s electoral landslide swept aside the “maverick” once and for all.

Palin had staying power though, the suckling corporate media, always looking for a cheap story that appealed to the morons and living off of the government dole shut ins and rarely a news cycle went by without some sort of Palin update. She parlayed her fame with the peckerwoods and knuckle-draggers into a reality show, book deals and speaking engagements, quitting her real gig as Alaska’s governor to chase the money. She even starred in a bizarre movie version of her kampf unbelievably called “The Undefeated” which was even less popular than the idiotic adaptation of Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged that was launched earlier this year.  While suffering a huge ding in her image largely due to the sleazy insinuations of violence and killin’ that was a feature of her ongoing campaigns and accumulation of dough with the tragic attempted murder of Arizona congresswoman Gabby Giffords – the asshats in Palin’s org. had featured a nifty map with a gunsite on top of Giffords’ district she actually dropped off of the media screen – temporarily of course. She was soon back on a heavily hyped bus tour just in time for Memorial Day where in true Republican fashion she could hijack the day from the war dead for her own political agenda like the greedy, disrespectful narcissist that she is.

Palin being the divisive figure and insatiable media whore that she is would naturally compile a long list of enemies, a good many in the GOP establishment who likely resented having to kiss her ass for two plus years. Palin also has a past and the dirty little secrets are starting to seep out. This spring saw a book launched by a former ally named Frank Bailey entitled Blind Allegiance to Sarah Palin which portrayed Palin as vindictive, driven, immoral and unethical in her pursuit of power. The book unfortunately was lost in the cacophony of crap when the Palin bus tour was launched at a suspiciously coincidental time so as to swallow the revelations in Bailey’s book. Now there is a new book on flag-draped, dumb-ass America’s sweetheart that is far uglier than the first. Author Joe McGinniss trots out The Rogue which has assholes all along the teabagger right puckering for allegations of drug use and even better yet that Palin had a yearning for fucking black men back in her younger days. Notably an alleged fling with former NBA basketball player Glen Rice during his college career with Michigan when Palin was covering the team and that she had a “fetish’ for black men.

The Palin-Glenn Rice allegation (which hasn’t been denied) conjures an image of Michelle Bachmann going around the world on that Iowa corndog. One has to wonder just how much these third generation Phyllis Schafly’s just have this primal urge to deep throat twelve plus inches of hot meat. Schlafly’s gay son could certainly appreciate it that’s for sure.Sarah Palin just has that twinkle in her eye that makes one believe that she can do more tricks with a six-inch prick than a monkey on a grapevine, the teabaggers see it too which contributes to her enormous popularity with the angry white male masturbator demographic.


Back when I was much younger I knew a  black fellow named Lenny Stokes who was quite the cocksman, servicing bored metropolitan Denver area suburban housewives while working for a cable television company. This was back during the cable explosion of the 80’s when every house in America was being wired into Reagan’s propaganda machine. He worked with a partner who was a beer alcoholic Mexican named Hector Olivas with a serious jones for the devil weed. Hec’s favorite brew was Mickey’s Big Mouth malt liquor or as we used to refer to it due to the glass bottles “little green grenades”. He would show up for work in the mornings with his eyes blood red and reeking of dope, it cut the edge of the previous night’ hangover. Hec’s specialty was to cut under the table deals with those so inclined to participate in order to add the additional channels like Showtime, The Movie Channel, Cinemax etc for extra party money.


Lenny Stokes was more into “white pussy”, his favorite saying was “I know that white woman wants some black dick”.  I would say that he put more shots through the hairy hoop than Glenn Rice and who knows, had that gig lasted he may have even given Wilt the Stilt a run for his money in bedding women. Lenny always had the rap with the Christian “bitches’, his daddy back when he was growing up in Enid, Oklahoma had been a preacher and he talked the talk. For some reason that I can only speculate they were the most receptive and sexually frustrated and Lenny was able to connect.


I will always remember Lenny and Hec for their sheer luck, one might say, if they are prone to believing in religious nonsense superstition that a higher power had intervened when an outer Brighton area husband happened to get home early while Stokes was delivering the beef and Pete was passed out in the cable truck after a liquid lunch. The hubby went fucking berserk and went for his gun, putting several bullet holes into the back of the escaping white cable truck. I never heard how they managed to explain that to their bosses.


Hell, I don’t where I am even going with this other than the Palin-Rice fuckery conjured up memories of an old acquaintance… so I digress…


Todd Palin naturally screamed LIES..LIES..LIES. It would be too much for that northern, secessionist, white supremacist to accept that every time that he kissed America’s most well-known hockey mom that he was planting his smackers on a black man’s crank by proxy.


The one thing about the whole Palin fucked Glen Rice tale isn’t that she being a young single woman was into hot and nasty sex or that she did some blow on occasion it is the sheer hypocrisy of it all. Palin presents herself as some sort of chaste and holier than thou champion of those “family values” that the debauched Christers in the Republican party have been spouting for decades. Really, if you are going to talk the talk, walk the walk and Sarah Barracuda’s history doesn’t match the rhetoric of the all-American Mama Grizzlie.

Then there is the thing with fucking a black basketball player, not that any sort of interracial sexual activity is any sort of an issue and I personally tend to believe what Senator Jay Bullington Bulworth proposed in that we should all just start fucking one another until everyone looks the same. But whenever one of these pigs from the GOP end up being caught fucking a black man or woman or are caught in an airport bathroom with a cock in their mouth they need to be appropriately vilified. After all, the Republican party is nothing but a neo-Confederate, racist to the bone, anti-gay pack of vicious haters and bullies who would be as in their element in a 1930 German beer hall as they are in their opulent megachurches or local teabagger bund meetings.


The book “Rogue” has the right-wing swine in the sort of circle the wagons, attack mode that hornets or WASPS typically instinctively conjure as they scramble when someone has whacked the hive and according to the author the rhetoric is getting close to inciting violence against his person. Hell, it’s sheer hypocrisy once again from these degenerate, fake Christian, fascist pigs. Where the fuck was the outrage over the Regnery Publishing shit that had Hillary Clinton having Satanic lesbian orgies in the White House basement and hanging miniature glass crack pipes from the Clinton’s Christmas tree? I’ll tell you where, it was in the same place where all of this anger and indignation was when Bush was running up the national credit card.


Perhaps There is something deeper with Palin’s Obama obsession…. if I cold locate Lenny Stokes, if he is still alive and didn’t get the Steve McNair treatment maybe I could ask him.