Category Archives: Republican Phonies

George Felix Allen: A Cornered Varmint

First he’s denouncing dark skinned volunteers of his opponent by using foreign slang terms that mean the same thing as what is potentially the most inflammatory slur in the English language that is the dreaded ‘N Word’ and then he claimed that he didn’t know what it meant. A few weeks later he threw a hissy fit when it came out that there was a bit of Jewish heritage on his mother’s side of the family but when his surprise and anger over being outed became a story unto itself he claimed that she never actually had told him his grandparents were Jews and by golly she made him yummy ham sandwiches and pork chops too.

It was such a display of bungling, phony ineptitude that he might as well as had the yiddish word for chump: SCHLEMIEL flashing in neon lights on his forehead. George Felix Allen has in the last two months proven nothing outside the ugly truth that he is a fraud, a bigot, an opportunistic stooge and to use one of the great critic H.L. Mencken’s favorite terms,a “mountebank” who is far more adept at fantastic feats of flip-flopping than a seasoned frycook at a busy Richmond francise location of that favorite peckerwood fine dining establishment known as The Waffle House.

And now in another story that that not only is the most inflammatory of all about the exploits of the dude rancher George Felix Allen mainly because it seems to tie all of those otherwise disparate quirks of his fondness over the nooses in his office (ironically an autoerotic asphyxiation fetish would probably now seem like a preferable explanation to a cornered racist) to an attraction to the Confederate flag despite not being from the south to his recently revealed youthful proclivity for tossing around the pejorative n*gger whenever he wasn’t stuffing bloody, severed deer heads into the mailboxes of black folks up in a nice big box adorned with a confederate flag colored ribbon. I can’t wait to see George Felix Allen’s inept campaign manager Dick Wadhams try to spin this latest story away

The latest and so far the greatest story about his phony comes courtesy of the website Salon and offers up these wonderfully tantalizing tidbits of pure red meat on the besieged dude ranch desperado:

“Allen said he came to Virginia because he wanted to play football in a place where ‘blacks knew their place,'” said Dr. Ken Shelton, a white radiologist in North Carolina who played tight end for the University of Virginia football team when Allen was quarterback. “He used the N-word on a regular basis back then.”

A second white teammate, who spoke on the condition of anonymity because he feared retribution from the Allen campaign, separately claimed that Allen used the word “nigger” to describe blacks. “It was so common with George when he was among his white friends. This is the terminology he used,” the teammate said.

A third white teammate contacted separately, who also spoke on condition of anonymity out of fear of being attacked by the Virginia senator, said he too remembers Allen using the word “nigger,” though he said he could not recall a specific conversation in which Allen used the term. “My impression of him was that he was a racist,” the third teammate said.

Shelton also told Salon that the future senator gave him the nickname “Wizard,” because he shared a last name with Robert Shelton, who served in the 1960s as the imperial wizard of the United Klans of America, a group affiliated with the Ku Klux Klan.
 That thing about nicknaming his buddy ‘Wizard’ just fucking kills me as it is just so indicative of the mentality of these red state yahoos who take pride in their regressive ignorance. You know that things are getting grim when even celebrity obsessed Newsweek is starting to run stories on the the dude rancher whose bid to be the heir apparent for George W. Bush/Ronald Reagan/John Wayne style of American cowboy iconography is cowering in the sagebrush hoping to avoid the posse .

George W. Bush and the Republican party leadership needs to take a serious and principled stand and denounce George Felix Allen’s recent conduct in a similar manner as to they did to Good Ole Boy Trent Lott when Bush himself strongly condemned the former Senate Majority Leaders’s slobbering testimonials to the infamous bigot Strom Thurmond back in 2002. The big difference is then they had the ultimate American fraud, the penultimate lackey and the completely unprincipled charlatan Bill Frist waiting in the wings with marching orders to ram through Congress every legislative priority of the Bush-Cheney-Rove Axis of Evil balanced on the backs of the regressive, rubber fetus waving toads of the religious right who were spoiling for a fight and led by Frist and Tom DeLay turned the Florida hospice wherein lay the wasting body of Terri Schiavo into their own version of the Alamo.

But I digress…

In the lead up to the November elecions it is very apparent that the Bush administration and specifically Karl Rove don’t want to do anything to potentially piss off the Jesus juicing, NASCAR watching, angry redneck contingent of the hard core party base in ‘peckerwood nation’ down south of the Mason Dixon line. In fact there are surely millions who actually dig the fact that George Felix Allen is a dyed in the wool, rebel flag flying, epithet spewing, football talkin’, tobacco chewing manly man who loves to schmooze with neo-Confederate, white supremacists who hang out at rebel power hate-fests like the annual American Renaissance bacchanals of bigotry.

These same knuckle dragging freaks gave us George W. Bush in the first place and if not for George Felix Allen’s ugly self-immolation would be die hard and damned proud of it ‘Allen Lumpen Republicans’ in 2008. Now they will have to go find some other theocratic bigot who has at least some degree of crossover appeal to the restive moderates that were always looking for that man in the white hat to ride in to keep the savages at bay.

George Felix Allen will be soundly whupped next month but with his brother Bruce running an incredibly lousy NFL franchise down in Tampa Bay there will always be a job for GFA, even if it is for a ballboy and hey, after all nepotism is HUGE in the GOP.

George Felix Allen may or may not be the type of guy that would light a burning cross on a black family’s lawn but I would sure as hell bet that he would gladly come over to toast a marshmallow or two over the flames if he saw one.