Category Archives: Batman

Neocon Nocturnal Emissions

“They (sic) are a superstitious cowardly lot so my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts, I must be a creature of the night, black, terrible…a…a…”

-Nocturnally fixated millionaire GOP donor Bruce Wayne

The needle on the good ole puke-o-meter got buried early this week when it came to my attention that certain fascist propagandists (chiefly that foreign pig Rupert Murdoch’s recently acquired shit rag WSJ) were – get this – actually comparing the comic book hero Batman in the new mega-blockbuster The Dark Knight to George W. Bush and his phony war on terror.

I just can’t make shit like this up so here you go:

What Bush and Batman Have in Common

By Andrew Klavan

July 25, 2008; Page A15

A cry for help goes out from a city beleaguered by violence and fear: A beam of light flashed into the night sky, the dark symbol of a bat projected onto the surface of the racing clouds . . .

Oh, wait a minute. That’s not a bat, actually. In fact, when you trace the outline with your finger, it looks kind of like . . . a “W.”

There seems to me no question that the Batman film “The Dark Knight,” currently breaking every box office record in history, is at some level a paean of praise to the fortitude and moral courage that has been shown by George W. Bush in this time of terror and war. Like W, Batman is vilified and despised for confronting terrorists in the only terms they understand. Like W, Batman sometimes has to push the boundaries of civil rights to deal with an emergency, certain that he will re-establish those boundaries when the emergency is past.

And like W, Batman understands that there is no moral equivalence between a free society — in which people sometimes make the wrong choices — and a criminal sect bent on destruction. The former must be cherished even in its moments of folly; the latter must be hounded to the gates of Hell.

“The Dark Knight,” then, is a conservative movie about the war on terror. And like another such film, last year’s “300,” “The Dark Knight” is making a fortune depicting the values and necessities that the Bush administration cannot seem to articulate for beans.

Conversely, time after time, left-wing films about the war on terror — films like “In The Valley of Elah,” “Rendition” and “Redacted” — which preach moral equivalence and advocate surrender, that disrespect the military and their mission, that seem unable to distinguish the difference between America and Islamo-fascism, have bombed more spectacularly than Operation Shock and Awe.

Why is it then that left-wingers feel free to make their films direct and realistic, whereas Hollywood conservatives have to put on a mask in order to speak what they know to be the truth? Why is it, indeed, that the conservative values that power our defense — values like morality, faith, self-sacrifice and the nobility of fighting for the right — only appear in fantasy or comic-inspired films like “300,” “Lord of the Rings,” “Narnia,” “Spiderman 3” and now “The Dark Knight”?

The moment filmmakers take on the problem of Islamic terrorism in realistic films, suddenly those values vanish. The good guys become indistinguishable from the bad guys, and we end up denigrating the very heroes who defend us. Why should this be?

The answers to these questions seem to me to be embedded in the story of “The Dark Knight” itself: Doing what’s right is hard, and speaking the truth is dangerous. Many have been abhorred for it, some killed, one crucified.

Leftists frequently complain that right-wing morality is simplistic. Morality is relative, they say; nuanced, complex. They’re wrong, of course, even on their own terms.

Left and right, all Americans know that freedom is better than slavery, that love is better than hate, kindness better than cruelty, tolerance better than bigotry. We don’t always know how we know these things, and yet mysteriously we know them nonetheless.

The true complexity arises when we must defend these values in a world that does not universally embrace them — when we reach the place where we must be intolerant in order to defend tolerance, or unkind in order to defend kindness, or hateful in order to defend what we love.

When heroes arise who take those difficult duties on themselves, it is tempting for the rest of us to turn our backs on them, to vilify them in order to protect our own appearance of righteousness. We prosecute and execrate the violent soldier or the cruel interrogator in order to parade ourselves as paragons of the peaceful values they preserve. As Gary Oldman’s Commissioner Gordon says of the hated and hunted Batman, “He has to run away — because we have to chase him.”

That’s real moral complexity. And when our artistic community is ready to show that sometimes men must kill in order to preserve life; that sometimes they must violate their values in order to maintain those values; and that while movie stars may strut in the bright light of our adulation for pretending to be heroes, true heroes often must slink in the shadows, slump-shouldered and despised — then and only then will we be able to pay President Bush his due and make good and true films about the war on terror.

Perhaps that’s when Hollywood conservatives will be able to take off their masks and speak plainly in the light of day.

Mr. Klavan has won two Edgar Awards from the Mystery Writers of America. His new novel, “Empire of Lies” (An Otto Penzler Book, Harcourt), is about an ordinary man confronting the war on terror.

Well there it was. I just had to post that gut-wrenching piece of shit in it’s entirety, how fitting that the hack who wrote it has a novel called “Empire of Lies” but of course it’s not the only one, far be it from neocons to actually use anything remotely resembling originality (note the hysterical commercial from the war criminal McCain comparing Jesus Obama to the ubiquitous Paris Hilton and that twisted little fuck bunny Brittney Spears – only in America), the Bush-Batman comparisons are rapidly spreading through the reich wing brain dead blogosphere and accompanying fascist media machine like freshly torched gas from a lighted Heineken fart. Even Spanky Limbaugh weighs in on it (no pun intended) as he panders to his addle brained dittohead dipshit co-dependent audience. In a strange bit of irony that largely goes unmentioned (especially in conservative circles) the guy who played Batman was recently arrested for beating his mother – real swell for the ‘values’ volk but certainly not surprising that the bottom feeders identify with such behavior. As with George W. Bush the Oedipus Complex seems to run deep with the sort of deviant fucks who gravitate the the fascist Republican party.

I haven’t actually seen The Dark Knight myself as of yet although I plan on it. I loved the first one and am a big Christopher Nolan fan (you have just got to fucking see The Prestige if you haven’t already) and even better it is supposed to have the trailer for my favorite graphic novel of all time, Watchmen premiered before it. The Dark Knight’s reviews have been spectacular and I tend to like movies that are more than a bit on the dark side, after all, the world is certainly not a candy-coated apple like far too many ass ostriches and Pollyannas skipping down their white picket fence lined primrose paths to perdition would like to believe it is. It is a serious morality play in which Batman must cross the lines of morality to take down a psychotic and vicious enemy in Heath Ledger’s Joker. who is pretty much a ‘terrorist’ in this one (actually a chaos loving anarchist would be a better description but in the post-Orwell era of 2008 what the fuck are words really worth?) and the think tankers have brilliantly seized on the plotline to unbelievably try to plant their freak flags right in the middle of Gotham City as justification for their ongoing war on American ideals and their savage stealing away of our freedoms under the cover of darkness.

It should come as no surprise that I feel the same tactics and worldview is merited when confronted with those who don’t play by the rules and the neocons and their ilk are the real life villains who I speak of. To hell with peering into Nietzsche’s abyss because sometimes you really DO have to become a monster to fight one and the fascist Republican war on America has certainly been waged by immoral monsters against a largely innocent albeit woefully ignorant public. I have always said that if you are going to deal with the large scale extermination projects that really rid us of our rats and cockroaches that you can’t be afraid to get your hands dirty, in order to deal with slime you have to be willing to climb down into the gutter in which it resides. I dig Batman but really V For Vendetta is much more my bag when it comes to getting down and dirty with the scum and it is a much more serious depiction of the neocons and their perfect society as laid forth by Leo Strauss, Karl Schmidt and the rest of the fucking Nazis who so have so inspired them as they have hijacked America using their dirty little coup d’etat that 9/11 provided cover for.

Despite all the adoration of the extra-legal tactics utilized by the Batman as he throws down with the Joker an important point that is missed by the neocon goofballs is that while Batman may engage in illegal surveillance, random beatings and renditions, hard core vigilantism and a general willingness to operate outside the pesky confines of the law like Dirty Harry or any other stock action figure of the past thirty years he is doing so for a good reason – trying to save Gotham City from evil and the existential threat that the Joker represents. The key distinction however that is missed is that he is not engaging in these sort of end runs around the law for the purpose of illegally eavesdropping and blackmailing journalists and political opponents, thumping those who may be nuisances to the looting spree, imprisoning without trial members of an opposition political party and providing protection for the racketeers who pay the Republican crime machine for their mob style tactics. Also Batman doesn’t engage in torturing naked Muslim men in gruesomely sadistic, sexually perverse tableaus which are then presumably filmed for the enjoyment of the sick fucks who run this big time con game that by now has become more revolting than even a jar of fresh vomit. The Rovian revisionism and use of movies and pop culture to manufacture consent for a very anti-American agenda would really be approaching parody if it weren’t so dangerous.

These neocons are very strange people, one would speculate that they are fixated on black leather batsuits which would indicated a serious kink factor leaning towards BDSM, I can only imagine them going gaga over George Clooney’s nippled bat suit and codpiece in the colossal failure Batman and Robin. There was also GOP hero and son of former Nazi goon Arnold Schwarzenegger in that one so the orgasm accelerator must have been irresistible. Then again, in this idolatry of Batman’s crusade against the Joker maybe they are still more than a little pissed off at the late Heath Ledger for putting a burr under the saddle of the great American macho John Wayne archetype by playing a gay cowboy in Brokeback Mountain. There are certainly a lot of seriously conflicted folks over in the Cult of the Elephant and for every Larry Craig that is exposed trying to suck a cock in a public toilet stall there are many more who are smart enough to keep a lower profile.

For those who are buffs of both history and American pop culture you may remember a certain Dr. Fredric Wertham who wrote a book called Seduction of the Innocent on the dangerous effects of comic books on America’s youth that was then used as justification for a Congressional inquiry into the comic book industry back in the heyday of the good ole Joseph McCarthy era. Wertham’s gaydar went off when he speculated that Batman and Robin may have indeed (and I shit you not) been homosexual partners and that Batman comics were a potential endorsement of such heinous and deviant lifestyles (I speak tongue in cheek of course, the water fountains in much of the country were still in many places still labeled as “colored” back in those days), he also inferred that Wonder Woman was a lesbian and railed against lurid depictions of murders in the popular horror comics of that day that ultimately resulted in the Comics Code Authority which was created as a form of self censorship by the industry.

Could it be that Wertham may actually have been onto something real? Perhaps Batman did trigger latent, prurient impulses in some – one can imagine the little wimpy Jewboy Billy Kristol beating off over Batman comic books in a darkened coat closet in daddy’s upper east side digs, his Joker like grin already present as the demons in his noodle that would one day lead him to become a shill for mass murder on a grand scale feasting on the darkness of those little psychological cues that were sinisterly implanted in the stories. Normal dudes jacked off to hard and soft core porn, semi-normal (although sheltered dudes like boy Kristol) at least jacked off to Catwoman but now we are living in the PNAC world of sick freaks and fantasy as reality so who the fuck knows that the fuck people jack off to anymore…Armageddon perhaps?

I don’t know, as freaky as it may be it is possible that Dr. Wertham is right about the leather fetishes and shit and perhaps the Murdoch Journal has a point that that bat cowl could fit squarely on King George’s pointy little head – after all, Jeff Gannon was sitting on someone’s face during all of those back door White House visits that he made awhile back.

Jesus Fucking Christ, is nothing sacred to these diseased pigfuckers