The Big Chunks Float to the Top: The Time 100

Not that I would ever consider Time Magazine which is one of America’s preeminent mouthpieces for the status quo to be anything other than a credentialed propaganda organ but the latest issue is an abominable disgrace. The special double issue dated May 2, 2011 pays homage to the “World’s Most Influential People”, a who’s who of warmongers, fascists, lunatics, bigots, corporate stooges, media hacks and opportunistic shits that is truly astonishing to behold. While a smattering of individuals of moral character and some redeeming social value are thrown in, for example Joseph Stiglitz, one of the few economists who called the ongoing depression in advance and the besieged and soon to be murdered by the CIA or locked up in Gitmo and tortured six ways from Sunday Wikileaks founder Julian Assange they are few indeed and their inclusion among the pigs, crooks, thugs and bitches and bastards who are revered in mini hagiographies is more of a big middle finger – a true fuck you to the peasants.

This is some of the worst garbage conceivable but in a land where in true Orwellian style has collectively accepted the maxims that “freedom is slavery” and “war is peace” and the National Football League is bitching about a prolonged labor dispute that could postpone their shameless exploitation of the 9/11/2001 dead with a special tenth anniversary kickoff tribute to the American Reichstag Fire it is yet another sorry-assed example of a society that sucks and is damned proud of it.

Some of the honorees:

His Highness Barack Obama – Or more precisely “Brand Obama”, “Obama.com” or “Judas Obama”. Never has one so disappointed so many in so little time. The shining beacon of transformational change to lead American out of the fetid dungeons of the Bush-Cheney torture state has proven to be even worse than his predecessors. Whether escalating the financially ruinous and immoral wars of aggression in Iraq, Afghanistan and dialing up drone strikes from afar in Pakistan the Pope of Hope is every bit the war freak and murderer that the office calls for. Obama has now thoroughly destroyed the economy to finish up the job started during the Bushreich, the appointment of Turbo Tax Timmy Geithner as a guardian to avaricious Wall Street interests and the reappointment of genocidal maniac Ben Bernanke as Federal Reserve Chairman should leave zero doubt as to whose side that Barry O. is truly on. As hardened criminals like Lloyd Blankfein of Goldman Sachs and his minions continue to loot with impunity Bernanke’s QE2 monetary policy to keep the casino going is contributing to a deadly upwards spike in food prices, fueling global unrest and ultimately starvation. One day Helicopter Ben will rank right up there with Mao, Pol Pot and Stalin when it comes to genocide by famine and Obama is down with it all. Say what you will about George W. Bush but at least he sent me $600.00. The corporate product in chief later weighs in with a piece of his own on Arizona Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords entitled “A Symbol of Civility” – quite an honor for someone who was shot in the head by a deranged gunman.

Hillary Rodham Clinton – The Secretary of State and the traveling saleswoman for U.S. imperialist policies. While much less obnoxious since the derailing of her Presidential ambitions Bubba’s better half radiated pure malevolence as she traipses the globe and ensures compliance or there will be war. Clinton along with Samantha Rice and the shrill harpy Susan Rice were instrumental in the latest unaffordable war in Libya. A few of the dubious achievements of Mrs. Rodham-Clinton was the leaked embassy cable showing that she ordered U.S. diplomats to spy on United Nations leaders (not that this didn’t occur under the Bush-Rove-Cheney Axis of Evil) and allowing retired CIA analyst Ray McGovern to be dragged away by goons and beaten up for standing up and turning his back on her during a speech where she was exalting freedom and democracy. Particularly embarrassed by the Wikileaks data dump Rodham-Clinton may personally administer the waterboarding of Julian Assange once he has been kidnapped and rendered into one of America’s secret torture black site prisons. 

John Boehner – Sadly the inclusion of Boehner, the orange-hued, chain-smoking, boozy Republican House Majority Leader is an improvement over say, Tom DeLay. While Tom of Texas was a ruthless bastard with an ideological agenda, an American Stalin who ruled with a relish for cruelty Boehner is strictly an “old school’ just plain corrupt politician. As well as a history of graft, lies and typically swinish behavior Boehner likes to go into these insanely over the top crying jags at the most opportune times. I would be hard pressed to think of a more nauseating spectacle than the unctuous fraud Bohner’s breaking into a blubbery jag of crocodile tears during any political debate nor a more hypocritical one, just think if the deposed Nancy Pelosi (who I am no fan of) would have broken down bawling and the attacks would be unrelenting.  Boehner’s act has always reminded me of that scene in the movie Used Cars where Toby the dog plays along with one of the lot lizard scams by playing dead to generate sympathy and guilt that would cause the prospective buyer to shell out money for the overpriced lemon that he would drive off the lot (the door fell off on the way out) – “that price is just too fucking high”! (I just had to slip that line in). Boner’s [sic] waterworks were right up there in terms of rank cynicism and in sneering insincerity as the tactics of any of the sleazeballs employed by the Fuchs Brothers on their competing lots and God knows in America there are ALWAYS buyers for that sort of lame horseshit – a land of suckers who breed like fucking rabbits and are ever proud to call themselves Republicans.

Paul Ryan – The neo-fascist Wisconsinite Bircher who is coming for your Medicare so that the real death panels can commence while the greedy pigs on Wall Street will be given the money to gamble with. The media fascination with the slimy little prick Ryan is just another example of just how much of a threat that the ruling class truly views the GOP co-opted Tea Party movement as. When featured in fawning front-page pieces in the Wall Street Journal the costumed clown army of pasty, fat, old white folks who are the true targets of scoundrels like Ryan and his ilk are the ultimate of useful idiots. In a true historical context the Tea Party is out protesting in FAVOR of the iron-fisted, tyranny of rule by the British Monarchy. Oh, and the homage to Ryan is written by none other than the extremist reactionary Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker who tabbed the rat-faced Ryan as “the Prophet of Republican Economics”.. you just couldn’t make shit like this up!

Charles and David Koch – After being outed as top financiers for the hostile fascist takeover of America the previously subterranean Koch Brothers have been working furiously to launch a public relations blitz for damage control. Their inclusion in the Top 100 is evidence of this but their images as some sort of misunderstood America loving patriots is about as dishonest and ridiculous as BP’s recent ad blitz featuring a parade of Louisiana residents inviting tourists to eat their contaminated shrimp.

General David Petraeus – None other than Defense Secretary Robert Gates contributed the gut-wrenching tribute to our very own General James Mattoon Scott. Nothing much needs to be said about Petraeus, the four-star bullshit artist who was pegged by his one time superior office Admiral James Fallon as an “ass-kissing little chickenshit”. King David is truly a disgrace to the uniform, for more in depth coverage see the Rolling Stone piece entitled King David’s War detailing how Petraeus cuts deals with murdering drug-lords as he promotes Surge II.

Joe Scarborough – That a guy who while a sitting congressman in Florida once had an ugly little inconvenience of a dead female intern being found in his office “morning Joe” has certainly carved out a place for himself that is very dear to the ruling elites is a textbook example of real American values.

Michelle Bachmann/Rush Limbaugh – The Minnesota moonbat Bachmann has replaced the deposed Sarah Palin as the leader of the wave of reactionary right-wing anti-intellectualism that is the equivalent of that of the Khmer Rouge and is the spokeswoman for the scumbagger mouthbreathers. The “conservatives delight” (of course there is nothing even remotely conservative about these fascists) is hailed by none other than that paragon of moral values Rush Limbaugh who claims to have “talent on loan from God” yet can’t achieve an erection without pharmaceutical assistance. While Glenn Beck was the sort of demagogue that would have made Der Sturmer proud it was the pigman whose pioneering rise as the voice of angry white male animosity poisoned the American heartland after Reagan fucked over the farmers and facilitated the early destruction of all that once made this county great. When Poppy Bush was riding high it was Limbaugh who he credited for his success, so much so that the diseased pig was invited to sleep overnight in the Lincoln Bedroom at the White Hose where he probably jacked off under the sheets.

Jamie Dimon – I have to say that I admire Time’s restraint here in honoring only one of the degenerate gamblers of Wall Street who have destroyed the economy and are still paying out millions in bonuses as the reassemble their toxic shit into more speculative instruments to finish the job. Only in America.

Arianna Huffington – Dubbed the Baroness of the blogosphere for her callous selling of her website Huffington Post (second only to the cyber den of iniquity of the great orange satan Markos Moulitsas-Zuniga’s Daily Kos as the most disingenuous and exploitative ‘liberal’ site) to corporate behemoth AOL for $315 million. You would figure that after a payday like that Der Baroness could scrounge up some change from her couch cushions to pay for the content that others contribute to the Huff Po but she exhibits the same sort of sneering sense of entitlement and disdain for those lower than her exalted status as Leona Helmsley. I must say that I consider it a badge of honor that in my six years as a blogger that I NEVER stooped to trying to get any of my work published at the Huffington Post.

Oprah Winfrey – Any serious honoring of the swine of American society would be incomplete without Oprah Inc. whose charismatic cult leader mass appeal could induce millions to eat a bowl of fresh dogshit on command. Oprah is the avatar of a colony of television lobotomized zombies who are slaves of the mind in Murka, as media critic Danny Schechter so aptly puts it “the more they watched, the less they knew”, if TV induced psychosis were a religion Oprah Winfrey would be its messiah.

Marine Le Pen – Daughter of uber-fascist Jean Marie Le Pen, the French counterpart to the U.S. Republican party when it comes to anti-gay, xenophopic, hatemongering anti-Semitic politics that are the bred and butter of leaders of the international klaven of Tea Baggers.

Benjamin Netanyahu – By definition every head of state is a war criminal, Bibi, the vicious and cunning overlord of the human rights abusing rogue state Israel whose mastery of the American fifth column of Christian Zionist extremists is truly a master of war.Now revving up for another incursion into Gaza that will be greeted with cheers by devotees of Israel’s off with their heads style of diplomacy.

Joe Biden – At least the picture of the veep didn’t have him with his nose embedded up Netanyahu’s ass. The piece, written by the ultra slimy and foul mouthed political hack Rahm Emanuel exalts Biden as “America’s Counselor in Chief” for the wonderful guidance that he has provided Obama during the third Bush term (or is it Clinton’s fifth?).

Noticeably absent was the 2009 Man of the Year Ben Bernanke, Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck or the Donald for that matter…

Just my two cents over the morning cup o’ joe

EE