Baby Bradgelina

“You know…..people are just pieces of shit”

-Daniel DeFoe

The unrelenting stream of bullshit that passes for news in the sad cesspool of shame that is the mainstream media never ceases to simultaneously amaze and disgust me. The love child of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie has dominated coverage over the weekend along with the tragic although all too predictable cacaphony over the latest and greatest natural disaster, this time a massive earthquake in Indonesia that killed at least 4,300 people, mainly peasants living in poorly constructed dwellings. Next to the toxic allure of celebrity, sleazy perversion, tales of wonder from the animal kingdom, child murderers and work related accidents involving miners of some sort there is nothing that gets the MSM’s panties in a bunch quicker than a good old natural disaster. The advertising gurus and network bean counters are already in the pre-planning stages of how to descend like a plague of locusts upon whichever coastal U.S. city happens to be devastated by one of the several massive hurricanes predicted to make landfall this season and any other catastrophe such as the Java quake represents both a bonus as well as a warm up drill. The cable news networks will undoubtedly swamp viewers in saturation coverage whenever a killer storm threatens Miami, Tampa, Galveston or even poor New Orleans again. The hacks who masquerade as journalists will seize upon the opportunity to grasp for the brass ring in search of instant stardom ala Anderson Cooper, the charlatan politicians will seek to posture and promote themselves while keeping a safe distance from any actual involvement in the human misery and the corporate vultures like Haliburton, Blackwater and Dyncorp will be awarded reconstruction contacts through a no bid spoils system and then bring in the same illegal immigrants to perform the work on the cheap while shafting the displaced in the immediate area.

What the mainstream media should be covering instead of panting and salivating over Baby Bradjelina is the horrible atrocity of the massacre of 24 Iraqi civilians in Haditha but the craven editors and owners of state run McNews conglomerates don’t want to taint Memorial Day weekend with any such unpatriotic stories, never mind that every day that the Bush administration is left unchecked to continue the massive assault on American civil liberties, the destruction of the working class and allowed to remain bent on instigating a disastrous global conflict is tantamount to pissing on the graves of all those poor bastards who died in any of this nation’s foreign wars to preserve liberty only to see it surrendered with nary a whimper from the childlike cretins of the second generation of television babies. The media should be covering Friday’s closed-door session where Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez and FBI Director Robert Mueller urged telecom execs to secretively keep records on all internet activity under the premise of a crackdown on child pornography. CNET news is the only place where I saw this truly important story that has successfully used the cloaking device of full spectrum corporate media dominance to fly under the radar of the public at large. Neither the Washington Post, the major television news networks or the damned liberal New York Times saw fit to cover it although they all swooned over the birth of Baby Bradjelina, all that was missing were their presentation of gifts of gold, frankincense and muir.

Truth Is Heresy: When the MSM is not exalting in the birth of Baby Bradjelina it is working on the behalf of the corporatist state in trashing and denigrating Al Gore’s hard hitting new movie on global warming called An Inconvenient Truth. In the tried and true method of muddying the waters and therefore denying the legitimacy of the debate industry front groups and their well placed and likely well compensated insiders and editorialists have combined to make snide remarks like the following by the notoriously biased Gregg EasterbrookL

“Gore says that the entire Greenland and Antarctic ice sheets could melt rapidly, the film then jumps to animation of Manhattan flooded. Well, all that ice might melt really fast, and a UFO might land in London too.”


Easterbrook is a longtime anti-environmental flack whose latest piece of asswipe destined for the bargain bin at your local Christian Nazi bookstore The Progress Paradox: How Life Gets Better While People Feel Worse features a cover shot of a glass of liquid that is dare it say it..half empty as an evocation of that famous Dale Carnegie style rhetorical question that is selectively used to judge whether a person is an optimist (Pollyanna) or a pessimist (realist) and therefore allow for the ostracism and marginalizing of any individual who dares to penetrate the sunny façade of ‘the power of positive’ thinking with the bummer of reality. This is a common problem in America society, specifically in the corporate environment and dare I sound pessimistic any society where telling the truth becomes a reason for being stigmatized is terminally fucked and destined for doom.
Harper’s Harping: No matter that our domestic manufacturing base is pretty much kaput and we have become addicted to the massive trade imbalances caused by the importation of cheap sweat shop goods that goose bottom lines in an appeasement to the temples of greed on Wall Street we have found an export commodity that seems to have the enduring potential of becoming the next great fad: fascism! Recently elected Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper, a right-winger determined to take down progressive society north of the U.S. border has played the George W. Bush card and began throwing the standard conservative hissy fit about the damned liberal media aka those who are trying to do their jobs by telling the truth. After reporters up and walked out of a recent press conference after Herr Harper refused to answer any questions he whined:

“Unfortunately, the press gallery has taken the view that they are going to be the opposition to the government” 
Then he refused to talk to them at all in the future and conjured up the good ole bias bogeyman.. now where have I heard that one before? Maybe Scotty McClellan would be open to act as Harper’s proxy now that the professional liar is out of work and looking for a new gig. And as far as Canada being a refuge for Americans looking to escape from the fascist menace by fleeing north it now appears that the most viable alternative is in Central and South America so this is as good a time as any to enroll in Spanish.

Posted on 2006/05/28, in Addicted to War, American Idiots, Corporate Media, Cult of Celebrity, Media Lies. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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